The Red Hand

Chapter 245.5 – Do You Have A Moment to Talk About our Lord and Savior Kitty?

"Good morning everyone!" Kirika smiled as she began her live broadcast. "This is Kirika here live from the Kingdom of Dumetor with an extra special program for you all today! So sit back and enjoy!" She was sitting in a small private sitting room that she'd been given access to for her news work. Though to Kirika it was far too fancy to be considered a sitting room. "The official bracket for the Interworld Tournament was drawn up just a few minutes ago, and I was lucky enough to get two of the contestants to speak with me about the upcoming event, so without further ado, please give a warm welcome to Ms. Zephiria and Ms. Yumi!" Kirika smiled as the two women, who sat opposite her, waved to the small floating camera.

“Hello.” Yumi smiled as she waved.

“Wassup!” Zephiria chuckled.

"Alright now, Ms. Yumi, I know that I used the term contestants, but you're obviously not participating in this event directly." Kirika said. "So what should I call you? None of the others that I've spoken with have called you Queen or Empress, so I apologize if I've been rude with my introduction." Yumi was effectively seen as Akagi's Wife by the outside world and it was well understood that messing with her would evoke the wrath of Hell itself.

"I... Please don't call me either of those things..." Yumi sighed."It's not good for my heart, but also, Akagi would never stop teasing me about it."

{I've already seen what Kana goes through with being the Demon Princess, and I'd rather not have that happen to me...} (Yumi)

"Queen Yumi would be quite fitting, though!" Zephiria snickered. "Come on. You can't tell me that it doesn't sound appealing." She nudged her in the arm.

"I was born to poor farmers in a remote village, so being called Queen is too much for me." Yumi groaned. She knew that Akagi would tell her that she was more than worthy of any title, but the Priestess still didn't want it.

{I'd rather just be Yumi the happy kitty fluffer...} (Yumi)

"And yet your lover is the Demon Lord!" Zephiria laughed. "That puts you as number two of an entire country, so we've got to get you a nice title to go with your new station!"

"I am merely a humble head of intelligence and certified Squishy! Everything else is beyond my purview." Yumi huffed and turned her head away.

{Squishy?} (Kirika)

"Yeah... Well, getting past that, is there something that I should call you? Perhaps Lady Yumi?" Kirika gave a wry smile.

"I am going to politely request that you don't call me that either." Yumi's calm expression gave way to something fierce for a moment before returning to normal. "I was called that every day for nearly a decade by both the villagers and the other Church members, and I've come to despise being referred to in such a way."

{Being called that by the other members of the clan is bad enough, but I have no intention of allowing others to use that same formality when speaking to me. I always hated being trapped by that duty...} (Yumi)

"I... My apologies. I had no idea that it was so offensive to you." Kirika's entire body tensed, fearful of what would happen to her if Yumi got angry. "Then is Ms. Yumi fine?"

"Just Yumi is good enough." Yumi sighed. She knew that getting Kirika to speak to her compeltely informally was unlikely, but she held out hope anyway. "But Ms. Yumi will work as well since I know how much your culture enjoys formalities..." She'd learned long ago that the Japanese tendency to place certain titles of signifiers on peoples' names had bled into her world and was the reason why her people did similar things.

"You can just call me Zef!" Zephiria smiled. "I don't need any fancy titles or anything!"

"Alright..." Kirika took a breath. "Then I'd like to talk to the two of you a bit. People have been curious about the events of the last year, and with the recent creation of an entire nation on what has historically been the Japanese Home Islands, there are a lot of questions floating around." There were many that were angry and upset, and the Government was still facing mass protests and calls for the nation's leadership to step down only grew louder each day.

"I can imagine!" Zephiria laughed. "The idea of some foreign nation setting foot in Japan has always been a strange concept, let alone part of Kansai being given away like that! I'd bet Nobunaga is spinning in his grave as we speak!"

{Oh there's probably enough of our ancestors spinning around down there to power the entire planet's energy needs if we stick a turbine to them...} (Kirika)

"But that leads me to one of my first questions, mostly for you Ms. Zephiria, but how do you feel about this turn of events?" Kirika asked. "You are/were Japanese, so I'd like to hear what you think about something like this happening to your former home."

"I mean, I don't really care." Zephiria shrugged. "I was never really too interested in politics or anything like that. I was always content to live a quiet life tinkering with computers and other gadgets, so it matters not to me if Akagi's the one running the show or if it's somebody else."

{Though nowadays its mostly playing with magic which is far more fun!} (Zephiria)

"Quite an interesting statement for one of Akagi's servants." Yumi rolled her eyes. "Shouldn't you be a bit more loyal to your master?"

"Akagi is well aware of how I work, not to mention that she's got me leashed quite good." Zephiria replied. "Plus, our arrangement was largely done out of curiosity anyway, so she doesn't expect too deep of a commitment from me on most days." Most the the time Zephiria wasn't even in Japan let alone Dumetor and her days were mostly spend on experiments in her Antarctic lair.

"Servant?" Kirika titled her head. "You've chosen to work for Ms. Akagi?"

{I suppose I get the appeal.} (Kirika)

"If by 'work for' you mean sell my soul to her, then yeah, I 'work for' Akagi." Zephiria chuckled.

"She's an awful employee, and I think that we need to start instilling some discipline in her." Yumi chuckled.

"Hey! I'm far more productive than most of the good-for-nothings around here!" Zephiria pouted. "At least I've been conducting quality research, and Akagi's been quite pleased with the results!"

{My thesis on Demon Lord power and how it interacts with Magic got me lots of praise from her! She even gave me a headpat despite how much I didn't want it!} (Zephiria)

"S-Sold your soul?!?" Kirika squeaked, covering her mouth immediately afterward. "Ah..."

{WHAT?!?} (Kirika)

"Eh. Its not that big of a deal." Zephiria shrugged. "It was sitting around collecting dust anyway, so better that I put it to work." She winked. "I've gotten lots of perks out of signing my soul away to here, and there's probably no other Demon out there that would give me such a sweet deal!"

{I get unlimited test subjects and boatloads of research funds to boot!} (Zephiria)

"Indeed, Akagi is far nicer than Demons that I read about in the different scriptures." Yumi laughed. "Though one needs to read the fine print on her contracts since she has a nasty habit of putting things in with the hope that you just sign without checking."

{At some point I'm expecting someone to sign a deal and be forced to speak like Ara or something.} (Yumi)

"Why do you think that I had Akagi go over everything in that book of a document before I signed." Zephiria rolled her eyes. "I didn't need some crazy requirement like giving pets six days a week."

"And yet you give her plenty anyway!" Yumi giggled.

{Besides, giving pets is a privilege!} (Yumi)

"Well, Catkagi is cute..." Zephiria coughed as she turned back to a slightly confused Kirika. "Ah, yeah... I forgot normal people don't have conversations about selling their souls to Demons, do they?"

"Probably not." Yumi gave a nervous smile. "I suppose we've had our common sense warped by Akagi's actions..."

"You say that, but if I'm not mistaken, YOU were the one who made the Cult of the Demon Lord a reality." Zephiria grinned.

{Cult of the WHAT NOW?!?} (Kirika)

"I simply wished to ensure that Akagi was respected properly." Yumi huffed.

"More like you just wanted a place to gush about the kitty." Zephira snickered. “I know what you're all about, Yumi.”

"Why are you talking like you don't occasionally show up to our services?!?" Yumi poked her in the cheek. "At the last one you brought that, absolutely amazing, French Onion Soup!"

{I need to get that recipe! It made my own seem bland by comparison!} (Yumi)

"I enjoy a good potluck and games, what can I say." Zephiria shrugged.

"Surrrrrre. But I don't really think either of those things requires you to have our prayer book memorized." Yumi's lips curved into a smirk.

"Ah!" Zephira tensed up. "I mean... You gave it to me..." She started sweating.

"And you also had a lot of fun during kitty pet time last Friday." Yumi continued to poke her in the cheek. “You were very happy to have her all to yourself for a bit of snuggling.”

"Anyone would enjoy the fluff!" Zephiria shouted, her face starting to flush from embarrassment. "I can't help wanting to pet the kitty!"

{SHE'S TOO FLUFFY! ITS NOT SCIENTIFICALLY POSSIBLE TO DECLINE WHEN SHE ASKS FOR PETS!} (Zephiria)

"I don't know..." Yumi put her finger to her lip. "You were awfully interested in Misha's little sermon that morning when she talked about feeling Akagi's warmth wrapped around her soul." She smirked, and Zephiria's face turned bright red.

"What..." Kirika was completely confused and no longer had any idea what they were talking about.

“Ack!” Zephiria squeaked, embarrassed that her secret was out.

"Admit it!" Yumi pointed directly at Zephiria. "When you became her Warlock, you became like Misha!" She snickered.

"I..." Zephiria turned away, but Yumi wouldn't relent and kept up her attack.

"Go on, say it. Say how much you love the Demon kitty's warmth." Yumi continued. “♫You know you want to!♫ ”

*POOF*

Under Yumi's mounting pressure, Zephiria teleported away.

"Ah, she ran away." Yumi laughed. "I suppose my teasing was a bit too much for her to bear." She turned to Kirika. "I'm sorry, it looks like I chased away one of your guests, please forgive me."

"No... It's alright..." Kirika could do little more than nod. "But um... What is the Cult of the Demon Lord?" Her words caused Yumi's eyes to glint, and Kirika got the feeling that she'd made a massive mistake by asking that question.

"Where do I even start?" Yumi smiled.