Reincarnated as the Villainess’s Unlucky Bodyguard

The creature let out a deafening roar, its wings unfurling in a display of dominance. A ripple of power surged through the air, forcing both girls to brace themselves.

Enara scowled, her hands igniting with flickering darkfire. "Liria, don't just stand there! It's big, not invincible!"

Big, not invincible? Liria's gaze darted to the stats hovering over the creature's head. Level 15. Strength 45. Health 2000. It was like comparing a house cat to a dragon. She tightened her grip on her sword, muttering under her breath, "Yeah, no pressure."

[Pro tip: Its weakness is fire. You know, the thing you're mildly competent at. Unless you'd rather take up knitting instead.]

You are unbelievable, Liria shot back mentally.

The Wyrmling lunged, its massive claw raking through the air. Liria dove to the side, rolling into a crouch as the ground where she'd stood shattered into rubble. Enara darted in the opposite direction, her smaller frame easily avoiding the debris.

"Cover me!" Enara yelled, summoning a blazing sphere of darkfire. She hurled it at the creature's chest.

The flames struck true, licking across its glossy scales. The Wyrmling shrieked, thrashing violently. Liria blinked in surprise as the flames left faint scorch marks.

[Update: Your companion's attack is ineffective. To translate: she's doing less damage than a sneeze.]

I noticed, Liria thought grimly.n/o/vel/b//in dot c//om

Enara grinned. "See? We've got this!"

"No, we don't!" Liria shouted, charging forward before Enara could do something else reckless. Her blade glowed faintly as she activated Blade Mastery, aiming for the Wyrmling's exposed underbelly. The strike landed, sending a burst of sparks flying as her sword scraped against its tough scales.

The Wyrmling howled in fury, its tail whipping around like a battering ram. Liria ducked, feeling the air ripple above her as the tail smashed into a nearby stalagmite, reducing it to dust.

"Liria!" Enara called out, her voice panicked.

Liria looked up just in time to see the Wyrmling rear back, its maw glowing an eerie green.

[Incoming attack: Acid Spit. Try not to die.]

Trying!

Liria leaped out of the way as a stream of corrosive liquid splattered onto the cavern floor. The acidic substance hissed, eating through the stone like boiling oil.

"Stop running and hit it harder!" Enara yelled, sprinting around to flank the creature.

[She says that like it's easy.]

Liria gritted her teeth, pivoting to face the Wyrmling head-on. She raised her sword, summoning Hellstorm, her strongest fire ability. A fiery vortex erupted around her, the flames swirling violently as they roared toward the Wyrmling.

The creature screamed, its body engulfed in the inferno. For a brief moment, Liria felt a surge of hope until the Wyrmling burst through the flames, more enraged than injured.

[Congratulations. You've made it mad. I hope you're proud of yourself.]

"Liria!" Enara shouted, hurling another darkfire attack. The flames slammed into the Wyrmling's side, briefly halting its charge.

"Fire's working!" Liria yelled back.

"Great! Do more of it!" Enara replied, as though it were that simple.

The Wyrmling turned its glowing eyes toward Enara, its tail whipping around with terrifying speed. Liria didn't think she moved, throwing herself between Enara and the oncoming strike.

The impact sent her flying. She hit the cavern wall hard, her vision swimming as pain radiated through her body.

[Liria, your health is down to 800. You're welcome for the update.]

Shut. Up.

"Liria!" Enara's voice was sharp with concern, but she didn't hesitate, charging forward and unleashing a barrage of darkfire attacks.

The Wyrmling staggered, momentarily distracted. Liria forced herself to her feet, gripping her sword with shaking hands. "You're insane," she muttered, staggering back into the fight.

Enara smirked, even as sweat dripped down her temple. "Takes one to know one."

The two of them moved in tandem, Enara's magic forcing the Wyrmling back while Liria targeted its weaker points. Fire and steel clashed against scale and claw, the battle growing more intense with every passing second.

Just as Liria thought they might be gaining the upper hand, the Wyrmling let out a thunderous roar. The ground beneath them shook violently, cracks spreading through the stone.

[Alert: Dungeon structure destabilizing further. Collapse imminent in 15 minutes.]

"What?!" Liria yelled, dodging another acid spit.

Experience more on empire

Enara frowned. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing! Just… keep fighting!"

But Liria's gaze flicked to the shadows, where the ominous figure from before still lingered, watching. The glowing red eyes seemed to glimmer with amusement, as though the entity was waiting for something.

[New target detected. Analysis incomplete.]

Oh, that's just perfect.

The figure stepped forward, the oppressive aura growing stronger. Liria's grip tightened as dread curled in her stomach.

"Liria?" Enara's voice wavered, her confidence faltering as she followed Liria's gaze.

The Wyrmling paused, turning its head toward the intruder. For the first time, it hesitated, as if it, too, recognized the danger.

The red-eyed figure raised a hand, and the entire cavern seemed to darken.

[Boss identified: ??? Level Unknown. Warning: Threat level exceeds current capabilities.]

You think?!

Before Liria could react, the figure spoke, its voice low and chilling. "Let's see how well you play, little humans."

The cavern plunged into darkness, and for a brief, horrifying moment, all Liria could hear was the sound of the Wyrmling's heavy breathing and Enara's uneasy shuffling.

"Liria," Enara whispered. "What is that thing?"

"I don't know," Liria muttered back, gripping her sword tightly. "But I have a bad—"

The lights flickered back on. The dramatic tension shattered as the mysterious "boss" stepped into the faint glow of the dungeon's eerie luminescence.

It wasn't some towering, menacing demon. Nor was it a second Wyrmling, which Liria would have honestly preferred.

It was… an pineapple.

A literal pineapple, no bigger than her hand, with stubby little legs and tiny, cartoonish arms. Its yellow surface was dotted with spikes, and its leafy crown tilted at an angle that gave it an air of perpetual sass. It glared at them or at least it seemed to, given its lack of actual eyes.

"What the…" Liria's jaw dropped. "Is this a joke?"

Enara blinked, her mouth opening and closing like a fish. "That's… not what I was expecting."

The pineapple raised one of its tiny arms, pointing a threatening finger at them. "Silence, mortals! You dare enter my domain and mock my form?"

Liria's brain short-circuited. She squinted at the creature, waiting for the system to chime in with its stats.

[Analysis in progress… complete.]

[Name: Ananara, Sovereign of the Sweet Sands

Level: 5

Health: 500/500

Weakness: Everything.]

Liria choked on her laughter. Weakness: Everything? Is this real life?

[Confirmed: This is, in fact, real life. And you are fighting an ambulatory fruit.]

The Wyrmling, clearly confused, let out a tentative growl at the new arrival. The pineapple ignored it entirely, focusing its attention on Liria and Enara.

"You shall pay for your insolence!" Ananara declared, its tiny voice trembling with rage. It hopped forward, attempting what could generously be called a "menacing stride."

Enara snorted. "Is this a dungeon boss or a joke prop from the royal chef?"

"Don't mock it!" Liria hissed, though she couldn't stop her own lips from twitching. "It might have a hidden attack or—"

Before she could finish, the pineapple lunged well, waddled toward her with a ferocious squeak. It jumped approximately six inches off the ground and swung its little arm in what might have been an attempt to slap her.

It hit her shin.

Liria didn't even feel it.

"I can't—" Enara doubled over, clutching her stomach. "I can't take this seriously!"

Liria sighed, rubbing her temples. "This is the dumbest thing I've ever—"

The Wyrmling suddenly growled, its tail smashing down between them and the pineapple. The cavern shook, and Ananara stumbled, flipping onto its back.

"Help!" it squeaked, legs flailing uselessly in the air. "I've been toppled!"

Liria exchanged a look with Enara. Neither of them could keep a straight face as the dungeon's "boss" flailed helplessly.

[New objective: Save the pineapple overlord? Or leave it to rot? Choices have consequences.]

Oh, shut up, Liria thought, as Enara collapsed into a fit of laughter.