Canon Fodder

CHAPTER 78 ALABASTA

It took me 2 days of running to find a ship going in the same direction. It was a little merchant ship. Onboard I couldn’t help but chuckle. Don Krieg had been in a huge ship and he ran with his tail between his legs from the Grand Line. But this small shop with people born and raised in the line could handle it easily. 

They noticed me onboard right away. But since I had money it was easy to pay for a fare and food. I slept on deck and stayed out of peoples way. My 4th day away from Amazon Lily I finally arrived in Alabasta. 

It was a desert island. I had slowly remembered the island as I drew closer. Run by a king, his daughter, Vivi, joined the Straw Hats after Nami offered to help for like a billion berries. 

The desert island hadn’t recieved any rain in years. People blamed the king for some reason. Crocodile, a Shichibukai like Hancock, was a government approved pirate. But like most pirates he wasn’t a good guy. He was stopping the land from raining somehow. 

This caused tension in the kingdom and eventually Vivi’s childhood friend led a revolt. Which just so happened when the Straw Hats arrived. I was sure more information would come to me, so I decided to just wing it for now. 

I really didn’t want to lose my bet with Nami. So I stuck near the coast. After talking with the locals they told me Crocodile was the savior of the people. Which was pure propaganda made up by the snake himself. They did tell me that he owned a casino inland. At a town called Rainbase. The ship dropped me off and I was on my way to find my crew. 

After some shopping I decided to change my face. Luffy and the other Straw Hats were causing trouble for Crocodile. And last I checked I still had a bounty. Using a transformation jutsu I turned into Kakashi again and hit the city. 

Hearing this or that it was mostly people jerking off Crocodile and shitting on the king. It was easy to see why people revolted. You would have thought Crocodile was the only thing keeping them safe. 

In my Kakashi guise I decided to check out the casino. Packed with people blowing their money I quickly joined them. Hoping to make it big I lost a million berrie pretty quick. Racking up another reason to kick Crocodile’s ass. 

I ended up drinking at the bar. Watching the entrance. Waiting for my crew to get there at any time. I expected Sanji, Nami, or Zoro to just walk in. But they didn’t. Another crew member did though. Not a current, but future. The beautiful and deadly Nico Robin. 

Dark tan skin. Long straight black hair. Wearing a white shirt with a fur coat her long legs stretched out with each step. I was pleasantly surprised to get a quest. 

A part of me had worried the Anti-Hero tag had followed me. But that proved to me it hadn’t. A big smile on my face I followed the tan woman as she walked further into the casino. 

Soon at an elevator I cast a chakra shadow around me. Much easier than a transformation Justu. The shadow was simply darkness. Sticking to the ceiling no one noticed as I got into the elevator. 

We went to a low floor and got out. Down a side hall. Then another one. She was soon walking into a meeting room. Right behind her Nico never suspected a thing as I moved to a corner of the room. 

She was quiet as she sat alone. No real emotions from the sad woman as she waited. Eventually 2 people walked in. I recognized them as part of Crocodile’s crew. 

Crocodile ran a secret organization called Baroque Works. Each member had a number. The lower the number. The stronger you were. Luffy and the crew should have beaten a few of them. The duo that just walked in were Mr. 1 and his woman partner, who had a weird name like Banana Split or Double Sundae or something. 

“Mr. 1, Miss Doublefinger, report,” a deep voice said from a denden mushi. The denden were a snail animal that acted as phones. I cursed. I had been close on the name. 

“No news,” Mr. 1 said. “Things are running smoothly. Plenty of discontent.”

“The brothels have been paying off nicely for spreading rumors,” the long legged Doublefinger said. 

“All Sunday?” The voice asked. Nico Robin spoke. 

“No news on Princess Vivi. We still think her and the Straw Hats are on Drum Island. This should be their next stop,” Robin said. 

“I want them dead before they reach land,” the voice said. It was Crocodile of course. I was tempted to beat him myself. But with my recent track record of killing, I didn’t trust myself. 

“They are just kids,” Robin said. 

“Doesn’t matter. They are in the way of our final goal,” the man said. “Now the next phase will be…”

I considered what to do while he spoke. Drum Island was where they should have gotten Chopper, the reindeer doctor. A boring arc, I wasn’t too thrilled to step in. I had at least a week or 2 to kill. Which gave me a very wicked idea. A smile splitting my face I waited until Crocodile stopped talking and stepped out of the shadow. 

“Nice digs you got here,” I said. My face of Kakashi still on, the 3 people turned quickly. 

The bald Mr. 1 quickly got up. His arms sharpened into swords. Doublefinger got up with him. Her hair sharpening into spikes. Robin didn’t react. Acting like she knew I was there the whole time. 

“Woah, calm it down. I thought you were the mighty Baroque Works,” I said confidently. “I just came to talk.”

The trio eyed one another. But the man on the other line spoke first. “Who are you?”

“Me, I’m Kakashi,” I said. “I recently landed on the island. And a little birdie told me that I could find some work here. I was following this beautiful woman,” I said pointing to Nico Robin with a wink. “And happened upon your little meeting. Consider my surprise when it turns out I’m listening in on a meeting of the infamous Baroque Works.”

“You know us?” The voice asked. 

“Of you? Yes. Everyone has numbers. Super secret code names and decoder rings,” I said. “I’m quite curious how you could be working right under Crocodiles eye.” I knew not many people knew Crocodile ran Baroque Works. So I played dumb. “But I’m curious about joining.”

The trio shared another look. The voice on the other end of the denden mushi laughed. “Interesting. Well to sneak up on these 3. I’m impressed. But there is a test to join.”

“I’m ready for any. I studied all night.”

Crocodile chuckled again. “What number are you aiming for?”

“Me? Gotte be number 1,” I said. 

“Really now,” Crocodile said. More intrigued. “Mr. 1. What do you think?”

“He doesn’t look so tough,” Mr. 1 said. 

“Then fight. Whoever wins, stays,” Crocodile said. 

“Well I don’t want to be kicking anyone out. And this guy looks pretty strong.”

“Backing down already?” Crocodile asked. 

“No. How about since I don’t have me a female counterpart you give me a new number.”

“Such as?”

“What number are you, Mr. denden mushi?”

“Mr. 0,” the deep voice said. 

“Then if I win. I want to be…Mr. Half,” I said. It sounded stupid. But Crocodile laughed. 

“Yes. I like that. Mr. Half,” he said. “Fight it out. I am looking forward to seeing what beats steel.”

I smiled big. Mr. 1 had eaten the Steel-steel fruit. He could turn his body into steel. Beating him was a big moment for Zoro. I couldn’t take that from him. Mr. 1’s arms sharpened to blades again. The metal shining in the dim light. 

“Well rock beats scissors,” I said. Pulling out my Chikyugi necklace the pink heart caught the light. The trio looked at it but I only drew Mr. 1 into the dungeon. 

It took time. But his body no longer steel. It broke easily under the guidance of my stone tools. After the 3 hours were done Mr. 1 dropped to the floor. Fear in his eyes. 

“Any fight left in you, Mr. 1?” I asked. Confused looks between the girls, it had only been seconds. 

“No, I-I give,” Mr. 1 admitted. Unable to look at me after the terrible treatment I put him under. 

“Hear that Mr. 0?” I asked. 

There was a long silence. “Yes, Mr. Half.”

“I look forward to working with you,” I said. “When do I start?”

“Right now,” Crocodile said. “A man I thought dead was seen on his way to the palace.”

“Whose that?” I asked. 

“Igaram,” Robin stiffened with the name. “Igaram is an advisor to the king. And the protector of the princess.”

I thought back. I was pretty sure there was an annoying singing guy that had been with Vivi. He pretended to die. Or they thought he was dead or something. “Do you have a picture?” I asked. 

Robin’s hands shook as she looked through her pack. Eventually pulling out a picture of the guy. It was who I thought. He had a curly wig or actual long hair. 

“Where is he?” I asked. 

“Between here and the palace,” the voice said. 

“Alright. I’ll be back with his head,” I said. Turning around I was out the door without another word. 

It took time to find him. He was haggard and disheveled. It took more time to convince him of my plan. Luckily the Straw Hats had mentioned me. And my bounty listed the Straw Hats as shipmates. So it wasn’t too much of a hassle. I told him my plan. Gave him some money. Then had him holed up in a hotel for a while. 

I came back to the casino that night with his severed head in a bag. Finding Robin, Mr. 1, and Doublefinger in the same meeting room I showed them the present.  

“Welcome to Baroque Works,” Crocodile said. “You’ll do nicely here.” Nico Robin had fear in her eyes as she stared at me.