The Guide to Conquering Earthlings

Chapter 29

But soon Lan Xi realized that her worries were unnecessary because although Xie Cheng's heart was pounding fast, he was still alive.

"The Earthling's Guide to Conquest" did not deceive me! Artificial respiration is a very effective first aid method!

However, although Xie Cheng was alive, he didn't look too well because his eyes were staring at Lan Xi as if they were about to shoot fire, as if he was about to interrogate her in the next second.

Was there something she didn't do well enough?

Lan Xi tentatively said, "Was I a bit slow in my reaction?" She immediately assured him, "Don't worry, next time as soon as your heartbeat accelerates, I'll give you artificial respiration!"

Unfortunately, her self-praise did not receive Xie Cheng's praise. After hearing Lan Xi's words, he furrowed his brows even tighter and his expression became more displeased.

"Your problem is not that you're slow in reacting, your problem is that you react too quickly," Xie Cheng said, looking at Lan Xi warily. "Stay away from me."

Lan Xi felt a little unhappy. "I saved your life, don't you even thank me?"

Xie Cheng coldly replied, "You did a good job this time, but next time, don't save me anymore."

"Then you... you'll just... leave..."

Before Lan Xi could finish her sentence, Xie Cheng interrupted her expressionlessly, "If you don't save me, I won't leave. I'm afraid if you try to save me, I'll leave even faster."

"..."

Lan Xi didn't understand the logic behind his words. Earth men were truly unpredictable.

But when Xie Cheng asked her to stay away, Lan Xi understood. So she obediently walked away to a distance.

However, soon Xie Cheng demonstrated the epitome of saying one thing and doing another.

Just as Lan Xi started to walk away, he couldn't wait and followed her as if he had his own free will.

But he wouldn't admit it. His face showed a particularly sincere and helpless expression.

"Why haven't you returned to normal yet?"

So what if he couldn't help being close to her? He was just making excuses!

He pretended quite convincingly!

Look how thoroughly she conquered him!

However, this was not a moment for Lan Xi to be complacent because soon a sudden and unusual sound caught her attention.

"Bang."

The sound was muffled and short, hidden amidst the laughter and cheers of the gathering, but the alert Lan Xi still caught it.

Almost instinctively, Lan Xi looked around and then focused on a row of cabinets next to the dining table.

Without giving Xie Cheng any time to react, she immediately opened the cabinet door and forcefully pushed him inside, then cautiously looked around before swiftly entering the cabinet herself.

In practical exercises, she was undoubtedly the number one on Planet Mu Yi!

Now, Earthlings faced danger, and it was finally time for her to take action!

When the cabinet door closed, it blocked out the outside light, and only a faint glow leaked through the gap in the door, creating a dim atmosphere.

And this cabinet was probably used to store fragrances. Lan Xi sniffed it with force and caught a scent lingering around her.

Xie Cheng had no idea how things had escalated to this point. Suddenly, he was forcefully pressed inside the cabinet by Lan Xi, and he felt utterly bewildered.

Was this all an act?! Lan Xi had been mischievous day after day.

What?

Pushing oneself down for artificial respiration was already quite absurd, but fortunately, luck was on their side. The men and women at the gathering had all congregated at the other side of the bar, so there were no witnesses to this scene. They could console themselves that if no one saw it happen, it was as good as not happening.

But now, what was the situation?

"Lan..." Xie Cheng was about to question Lan Xi, but before he could speak, she covered his mouth tightly.

She leaned close to his ear and whispered in a hushed voice, "Quiet! Don't go out! There's a robbery and murder happening outside! It's not safe!"

Robbery and murder?!

Xie Cheng was greatly shocked. His initial reaction was disbelief. In today's society under the rule of law, with the city's public security ranking among the top three in the country, how could a robbery and murder occur so brazenly in a restaurant in the CBD?

But ever since he met Lan Xi, Xie Cheng had gradually come to accept that in this world, the answers to some things were often both absurd and simple, and the most unbelievable things could happen...

Since Lan Xi was his part-time bodyguard, her swift and well-practiced reaction to this situation indicated that she was both alert and experienced.

It must be true.

This time, Xie Cheng didn't struggle to break free. Instead, he stayed quiet.

However, the air inside the cabinet was thin, and the lingering scent of the fragrance stored there, with its musky base note, wafted faintly. Xie Cheng breathed it in, while Lan Xi, afraid that he might act recklessly and rush out, pressed her whole body against him, her hands firmly holding him from behind, creating an ambiguous embrace. She whispered in his ear, oblivious to the situation, her voice barely audible.

In the confined space, amidst the ambiguous scent, and the moist, warm breath in his ear, Xie Cheng felt unable to hide or resist. Being in the cabinet with Lan Xi seemed more dangerous than being outside.

And Lan Xi, as if still unsatisfied, murmured in his ear, "Don't be afraid, I'll protect you!"

Her resolute and sincere appearance made Xie Cheng constantly remind and reassure himself to endure a little longer.

Xie Cheng endured and said, "I'll give you a bonus when we get back." He glanced at Lan Xi, who looked innocent and naive, then averted his gaze. "But in the future, there's no need to always stand in front of me when such situations arise. Protecting others should also be based on one's own safety..."

Although the situation was somewhat awkward and the posture was ambiguous, at least Lan Xi was a responsible bodyguard. In a critical moment like this, she showed such dedication. Afterwards, Xie Cheng decided he should present her with a plaque and a bonus.

As expected, his affirmation and trust in her at a crucial moment made Lan Xi look at him with eyes that seemed to hold stars.

For the first time, Xie Cheng believed in the saying that eyes were the windows to the soul.

In Lan Xi's watery, bright black eyes, the message she wanted to convey was about to be spoken.

Just as Xie Cheng waited for her to say, "This is my duty that I cannot shirk," he heard Lan Xi's suppressed voice, unable to contain her excitement, saying, "How much do you intend to give?"

"..."

...

He shouldn't have expected someone like Lan Xi to understand social customs and atmosphere.

However, it didn't take long for Xie Cheng to realize that something was amiss with the current atmosphere.

Because there was no sign of the expected chaos, panic, and cries for help outside the cabinet. Instead, there was still an atmosphere of laughter and joy, followed by...

"Bang"

"Bang bang"

...

Suddenly, Xie Cheng had a sense of unease, and he turned to look at Lan Xi, who held him tightly with extreme vigilance. Just as he was about to speak, Lan Xi once again covered his mouth with a force that almost suffocated him, restricting his movements.

"It seems like a team is committing the crime," she whispered in a low voice. "Did you hear it? Gunshots! Several shots in a row! Based on my experience, the first gunshot indicates that the gun is relatively new, followed by the second gunshot. The gun used for the third gunshot is the oldest, indicating that the person holding the gun the third time is the leader!"

"... "

This person could actually come up with such a plausible explanation!

During a brief struggle, Xie Cheng finally seized the opportunity to speak.

He was almost grinding his teeth as he said, "Have you ever considered that it's the sound of opening champagne bottles!"

As if to verify Xie Cheng's words, just as he finished speaking, cheers could be heard from outside the cabinet.

"All these bottles of champagne are on my tab. I'm honored to meet so many beautiful ladies at this event..."

"... "

Opening champagne bottles?

Lan Xi quickly searched her knowledge and suddenly realized that she had indeed overlooked this possibility.

Outside the cabinet, the man opening the champagne was still boasting, "The first bottle has the shortest aging time, and the last bottle is the longest. Everyone, taste and see whether you prefer a young or mature flavor. Which one do you like?"

"... " Lan Xi faced Xie Cheng's expressionless gaze and laughed awkwardly. "At least I got the duration right..."

She added eagerly, "At least I was vigilant. When it comes to safety, it's better to kill a thousand by mistake than let one slip through! It's better to be safe than sorry!"

Xie Cheng clearly couldn't be bothered to respond to her.

Lan Xi knew she was in the wrong, having caused a misunderstanding. Now that the truth was revealed, there was no need to continue hiding in the cabinet. However, just as she was about to open the cabinet door and leave with Xie Cheng, he pulled her back.

"Wait, someone is coming."

"So what if someone is coming?"

Xie Cheng's expression seemed at a loss for words. "With someone outside, are you planning to leave the cabinet like this? A man and a woman, one in front of the other?"

He glanced at Lan Xi's disheveled clothing, which had become wrinkled from being curled up inside the cabinet. The enclosed space made her face slightly flushed...

If this honorable scene suddenly emerged from the cabinet, what would people think? It was self-evident.

Xie Cheng couldn't accept that his upright and innocent reputation would end in such a peculiar way.

...

Lan Xi didn't understand why Xie Cheng refused to come out of the cabinet when there was no real danger. And when faced with her question, Xie Cheng refused to explain, insisting that they couldn't leave now.

However, at this moment, someone indeed arrived outside the cabinet.

Even the voice was quite familiar—

"I didn't agree to break up! I am your boyfriend, and you are not single. You shouldn't be attending this kind of mixer!

()"

...

—

"Number 2 ()"

These two people, one in front and one behind, seemed to have walked back to the venue of the mixer from outside. Instead of joining the lively crowd drinking champagne, they chose to argue in front of this row of empty cabinets.

Cao An's voice was somewhat straightforward. Lan Xi looked through the crack in the cabinet door and finally saw him holding Liang Di's hand tightly. "I never said I agreed to break up."

He's actually not dead!

"Breaking up only requires one party!" Liang Di's voice was full of anger, and her eyes were slightly red. "I don't want a boyfriend like you. When Xie Cheng asked if you were single, you actually said yes! You don't even acknowledge me as your girlfriend! So of course, I'm single!"

"Besides, there are so many men in the world who are better than you! Take Xie Cheng, for example. He's not far away, but he's a hundred times better than you, isn't he?"

"Xie Cheng has everything he wants. He's simply perfect, outstanding in every way, and good-looking too. I should take him as a role model to improve my taste!"

As the conversation outside the cabinet turned to Xie Cheng, Lan Xi instinctively looked at Xie Cheng beside her.

She saw his face, which had been displeased because of curling up inside the cabinet, now wearing a faint smile, as if such compliments were entirely reasonable.

And this smile widened after Cao An's next words—

"Xie Cheng is indeed handsome, wealthy, and exceptional in every way."

Xie Cheng's smile grew stronger, and it was at this moment that he noticed Lan Xi's puzzled gaze. He immediately frowned unhappily and turned his attention to the crack in the cabinet. "Why are you looking at me? What does that look in your eyes mean? What? Don't agree with what they're saying?"

Lan Xi was honest. "Although you are quite good, I don't think you're perfect. If I really had to nitpick, I could still find some flaws..."

Xie Cheng seemed to be out of breath once again, but fortunately, he managed to restrain some emotion and calmed down. He glared at Lan Xi and then looked through the gap in the cabinet door. "At least the employees I hired myself fully acknowledge me."

At this moment, Xie Cheng felt truly proud.

Indeed, he had casually asked Cao An if he was single not long ago, and Cao An had answered that he was single. However, any concerns about such concealment had already vanished upon hearing Cao An's unhesitant acknowledgment and praise.

Xie Cheng glanced at Lan Xi, who still seemed somewhat bewildered, and felt that his luck in choosing and employing people wasn't so bad after all.

Although Cao An hadn't shared his relationship with Liang Di, Xie Cheng believed that receiving such high praise and evaluation from both Liang Di and Cao An was already a rare two-way trust between an employee and a boss.

And Cao An's subsequent words deeply moved Xie Cheng—

"Liang Di had been single all along, accompanying her boss Xie Cheng on their journey of solitude. However, now she had found love and was no longer single. She was hesitant to break the news to Xie Cheng, fearing it would be a sudden shock for him. She worried that he would feel left behind, as if the entire universe had found companions while his ally had abandoned him mercilessly.

As Liang Di expressed her concerns, she turned to Cao An and said, 'Xie Cheng is not just my boss, but also my friend. I feel that it would be unfair to him if I were to tell him about my relationship while he is managing the company all by himself. I need to find a more suitable opportunity to discuss our situation.'

As Liang Di explained her thoughts, the initially angry Lan Xi seemed to soften. She gave Cao An a stern look, and it appeared that the tension between them was about to dissipate beneath the moonlit night.

These words not only resonated with Liang Di but also touched the tender part of Xie Cheng's heart. He never expected Cao An to care so much about his feelings. The only remaining concern he had completely vanished.

Once Cao An returned from his leave, Xie Cheng decided to celebrate and take care of him, including his girlfriend Liang Di. Xie Cheng couldn't help but glance at Lan Xi and exclaimed, 'Look at the difference between you and other employees.'

Just as he was about to take advantage of the situation and offer some on-site guidance to Lan Xi, Cao An, who was still outside the cabinet, spoke again.

'Xie Cheng is indeed exceptional, and I understand why you admire and appreciate him. But he may not be suitable for you because... he might be gay.'

Liang Di's face expressed astonishment from outside the cabinet.

Inside the cabinet, Xie Cheng's smile gradually froze.

However, Cao An was unaware of the storm brewing inside the cabinet. He remained calm and carefully chose his words, saying, 'Have you ever heard the saying? One hundred percent pure gold is actually not hard, but soft. The purer it is, the more malleable it becomes. Xie Cheng, being the epitome of perfection, a man made of pure gold, has not been in a relationship for so many years. I believe it might be because he doesn't necessarily like women.'

'So... you suspect that he might be gay?' Liang Di's face showed a pensive expression. 'Now that you mention it, it does seem quite reasonable... No wonder he has stayed away from women for so many years; it's highly probable that he's gay!'

The cabinet grew hot, and Lan Xi, feeling uncomfortable and hungry, struggled to stay focused. She didn't pay much attention to the conversation between Cao An and Liang Di outside the cabinet, only catching a few key words here and there. From what she gathered, Cao An was indeed alive, and the young couple had reconciled.

Lan Xi desperately wanted to leave the cabinet, but Xie Cheng had made it clear that everyone had to leave before she could come out. However, Cao An and Liang Di seemed to be engrossed in their analysis and stood there without immediately leaving."

Lan Xi was in a daze, but just as she closed her eyes to rest, the words "deep cabinet" suddenly caught her attention.

A deep cabinet?

Lan Xi looked up at the cabinet she was in. Although it was short in height, it was indeed deep enough to conceal herself and Xie Cheng.

It really was a deep cabinet!

In that instant, Lan Xi was in awe of Cao An's incredible foresight!

Cao An, you're something else!

To be able to guess that they were hiding in the deep cabinet, even without Lan Xi and Xie Cheng revealing themselves! It was amazing!

However, since Cao An and Liang Di already knew that they were hiding in the cabinet, there was no need to continue hiding.

Unfortunately, Lan Xi was astonished by Cao An's uncanny abilities and it left her speechless.

He tightly pursed his lips, his expression constantly changing, and his face filled with uncertainty.

Lan Xi couldn't help but shake his hand and said, "Xie Cheng! They know we're in the cabinet! We don't need to hide anymore! We can come out!"

...

Looking back on this memory, Xie Cheng felt a sense of confusion.

His emotions had been like a roller coaster ride, and before he could regain his composure and restrain himself, Lan Xi, who was beside him, excitedly said a few words and then pushed open the cabinet door and rushed out.

"Cao An! You're truly admirable!" Xie Cheng heard her excited voice filled with undisguised admiration. "How did you know that Xie Cheng and I were in the deep cabinet?"

"..."

"And also, Liang Di told me that you were dead, but now I see you alive! That's great! So, are you able to perceive everything so accurately now, even sensing that Xie Cheng was in the deep cabinet, because you've gained some profound understanding between life and death and become an enlightened being?"

"..."

Cao An's gaze, like a torch, turned to Liang Di. "I was dead?"

Liang Di looked embarrassed. "I said you should treat it as if you were dead. Haven't you heard the saying? A qualified ex should be treated as if they were dead."

"..."

Liang Di coughed. "Now you've been specially reinstated, so I've approved your request to fake your death."

...

Xie Cheng really wanted to pretend that everything outside the cabinet didn't exist. He wanted to stay in the cabinet and wait until everyone outside had left before coming out without any psychological burden. However, the annoying problem had not improved—almost as soon as Lan Xi went out, Xie Cheng's feet began to move without his control.

Five minutes later, under the bewildered gazes of Cao An and Liang Di, Xie Cheng made an effort to maintain his composure, dignity, and calmness, and was forced to crawl out of the cabinet!