Shadowborn

Chapter Nine: Scarlet

So far, today had been rather productive. It had cost most of the coin Allura had left me with, but my storage was full of new additions. An arsenal of basic weapons, some basic health and mana potions, actual cooking supplies, and a crate’s worth of adventuring supplies took up a good chunk. The supplies I’d gotten for my plans with Rhallani were the most important.

Hopefully she hadn’t been too bored all day. I’d left her with her books, but when I walked out of the inn that morning I hadn’t planned to spend nearly all of the day out and about. Squaring away our travel had taken most of my time. There was a caravan leaving in the morning, but I wanted to spend a few days in Listone before we worried about heading out. I needed to see if I could gather information about whatever threat was lurking in the forest before we left the town’s relative safety. There would be a smaller one headed south in a week, so we’d hitch a ride with them. It would be easier to find a group in the larger towns between here and the capital, so that seemed the safer option to me.

The largest part of the day had been spent using the guild’s training facilities. Thanks to my status, it had been relatively easy to register as an adventurer, though the measly F rank felt a little insulting. Once we settled, I’d need to raise it fast. I had a feeling I’d need whatever perks came with a high rank before too long. Once I’d been registered, though, I was able to start swinging some of my new weapons around. I definitely noticed the absence of my skills, but I was rather pleased with the muscle memory I’d retained.

I hated revealing anything about my abilities to any onlookers when I still didn’t know who my enemies were, but I didn’t regret using two of the day’s hours to get used to controlling my shadow tendrils. I’d learned that I could use them to pull things from my storage. And though they couldn’t lift too much or hit too hard, I’d managed to get somewhat proficient at whipping small objects like throwing knives with them.

I was also thankful to have some pants that weren’t quite so tight in the crotch and more than one shirt that wasn’t riddled with holes. Considering Listone’s size they were hardly the heights of fashion, but the only person who’s opinion mattered likely cared more about taking them off than looking at them.

Just thinking about the adorable-yet-perverted scholar waiting for me in my room made me smile. Our conversation this morning had gone better than I could have hoped, even if its ending had been … less than desirable. I hadn’t realized someone calling me master would evoke such a negative expression, but I could hardly be surprised. Most of the men I had been forced to call master in my life ended up dying by my hand, after all.

The woman behind the bar in the inn gave me an odd look when I entered, but I brushed it off. Maybe I was a sappy fool, but I felt a giddy warmth that only had a little to do with the promise of my own pleasure when I thought about helping Rhallani live out her dreams. Her wildest desires. I only hoped she didn’t start too strong out the gate. I had some experience with women, but it was rather limited.

Those thoughts fled the moment I hit the stairs. I could feel fear, sharp and frantic, coming from the direction of our room. My hand on my sword, I all but ran do our door and threw it open. She froze, mid-pace, and the moment she saw my face her fear spiked. After a quick look I saw that she was unharmed, so I forced myself to calmly close the door behind me and turn to her. I could feel her fighting—and failing—to get her fear under control, and my chest tightened.

Her eyes were wide and red-rimmed, and it looked like she’d been biting her lip so hard it had become chapped. She’d straightened when I’d entered and was clenching the folds of her skirt so tightly her knuckles were white. I searched her face for any trace of what might be wrong, and I realized her fear was directed at me.

Keeping my voice as level as possible, I asked, “what happened, Rhallani?”

The corners of her mouth turned downward. Her bottom lip trembled, and a film of wetness filled her eyes. “I fucked up!” she cried.

I couldn’t have stopped myself from stepping forward and wrapping my arms around her if I’d tried. “Hey,” I ran my hand down the back of her hair. It was still damp like she’d recently visited the baths. “It’s alright. Whatever happened, we’ll figure it out.”

She grabbed two handfuls of my shirt and buried her face in my chest, then shook her head. “I did something bad. Something really, really bad. And stupid. You’re gonna hate me. I know I’ve said it before, but this time it’s different. I did something you’ll never forgive me for!”

I gently extracted her from my shirt and put a palm to her cheek. “Rhallani, look at me.” She did. “I have known some very bad people in my life, and they did things to me that you’ll never be capable of. Whatever you did, there’s no world where it’s bad enough to make me hate you.”

I could tell by the look in her teary eyes that she didn’t believe me, which made my gut twist with worry. She was right about one thing, this time was different. I forced myself not to react and gently rubbed her shoulders. “Tell me. I promise I’ll hear you out and we’ll talk it through.”

She sniffled. “I don’t know where to begin.”

I wiped some of the wetness from her cheeks. “How about at the beginning?”

While she took a few breaths to calm down, I led her to the bed. I sat next to her, my hand at the small of her back the entire time. “One of my skills evolved,” she said abruptly.

My brows rose and a flash of panic fluttered in my chest. She’d leveled up from uncovering the tower’s secrets, did that mean she’d evolved a skill by uncovering one of mine? Could Allura be involved? Could the cursed blade? I shoved those thoughts away. “That’s fantastic!”

She clearly thought otherwise. With a trembling voice, she quickly described the nature of [Arcane Intuition] to me. With each word, I had to fight to keep my brows from inching higher and higher. In terms of information gathering skills, hers was incredible. The more I thought about it, the more these vibes from the universe sounded more and more like divine intervention. Was she meant to be Allura’s way of pointing me in the right direction?

“Since I get the feeling it’s relevant, can I know what question you asked today?”

Her cheeks darkened slightly. “After this morning, I wanted to know what I could do to help you.”

Damn. This girl gets a rare and potentially powerful skill and the first thing she does is use it to help me? What the fuck went down that she’s so afraid of my reaction? I gave her forehead a soft kiss, then urged her to go on. When she described the thuggish man and the reaction her skill had to him, ice flowed through my veins.

“Did he hurt you?” I asked, my body going rigid.

She shook her head. “No, but he did see my face. If he saw me again, he might.”

I was just contemplating hunting the man down when she started talking about how she’d followed him. When he’d caught her, and she’d been forced to lie and go walking through the pens. The way she talked about them made my skin crawl, and I longed to pin her down and kiss every inch of her until she forgot ever setting foot in them. How anyone could let something like that exist was beyond me, and I doubled down on my plans. The feeling in my gut only grew worse when she began describing the Seraphim girl she’d seen. I’d never seen an Arelim turn green until that moment.

I rubbed her back some more. “You want to help her, don’t you?” She stiffened. “I won’t pretend to be okay with this whole indebting system, but from what you’re saying it sounds like I can hardly make her situation any worse. If it’s important to you, we can go talk to her. See if she’d be willing to come along with us. Remember, I promised I’d never be angry at you for asking me anything. That includes requests. Even ones like this.”

She brightened for a second, but then only grew more miserable. “I—I’m afraid it’s a little late for that.”

In spite of myself, I recoiled slightly. My reaction didn’t go unnoticed, either. A tremble worked its way through her. “Rhallani,” my voice was barely more than a whisper, “what did you do?”

“I may have claimed her on your behalf.” She said the words with her eyes fixed on the ground in front of us, and for a full minute I couldn’t breathe.

I tamped down the emotions rolling through me. “Where is she?”

“Across the hall. I got us an extra room in case the bald guy comes looking for her.”

I held out my hand, and she placed the key into it without a word. She’d been clutching it so tightly it had cut into her palm. I took it, then grabbed her hand before she could pull away. I pulled a bandage from my storage and gently wrapped it before I let her go. “Let’s go meet her, then.”

She flinched at the flatness in my voice. We left our room behind and crossed the hall. After a nod from her I knocked on the door, then used the key to enter. The girl was already standing next to the bed with her head bowed, Rhallani’s clothes practically hanging off her. I thought I’d prepared myself for the memories I knew would come when I saw her. I was wrong.

I’d held onto the faint hope that Rhallani had been exaggerating the extent of the girl’s injuries, but seeing them with my own eyes I realized that the opposite was true. Even from across the room I could see them all. Worse, I could name the cause behind damn near every one of them.

The bruised scrapes that came from fingernails. The thin cuts that would have been caused by the blade of a knife being slowly drawn across her flesh. The outlines of the thick hands that had slapped and grabbed her all over. The swollen face where she’d been hit. Hard. The puffiness of her forearm where someone had grabbed and twisted it hard enough to fracture the bone. The torn and uneven hair that had been used as little more than a handle to throw her around. The curved line of square bruises that only came from humanoid teeth. The mottled bruising around her throat where it had been crushed in a vice grip on more than one occasion, likely while her assailant—

Don’t go there.

I knew if I looked under her clothes I’d find more of the same. Probably worse, If I had to guess. Then her eyes drifted up to mine and my breath caught in my throat. I knew the look. Complete disinterest in the world around her, as if she no longer had it in her to worry about what horror came next. There were no wants or hopes or dreams behind those eyes. Just a dull resignation that threatened to send me back to places I swore I’d never go again.

The lack of anything in her gaze cut me so deeply that it took a moment for me to realize I’d seen those eyes before. Not just the look, but the eyes. The color of blood with a single vertical slit. I’d seen the color of her flesh, too. A blue violet that was almost gray in the light. I’d only ever seen the two traits together once, and the memory made the floor pitch underneath me.

I managed to keep any trace of a reaction off my face. I could feel Rhallani behind me, waiting for judgment. I’d stood in the doorway long enough. I clasped my hands behind my back when I entered, partially to try and reassure the girl I wasn’t planning to strike her and partially to hide how they shook.

“What’s your name?” I asked her. Rhallani had told me how the question had gone for her, but I needed to gage the answer myself.

“This one’s name is whatever master wishes it to be.” Her voice was marred by the hoarseness that came from a throat that had been abused in more ways than one. Her head tilted a degree. “You are this one’s master?”

I closed my eyes to hide the anger I knew would show in them. This one. She’d been conditioned to refer to herself as such to remove any semblance of self. Then there was the title. The sound of it sent waves of revulsion through me even stronger than when Rhallani had used it this morning.

“Yes, though I dislike that title.”

Her head bowed slightly, and her eyes found the floor. “This one will refer to master however master wishes.”

I began to walk a slow circle around her. Every step sickened me, but I needed to know as much as possible about the girl’s mental state. “Ren would be preferred, but sir will suffice.” I kept my tone calm, but firm. I was walking a line here. If there was anything left in her to save, I’d have to be very careful not to snuff it out with carelessness.

When I left her line of sight, I’d hoped she would at least tense up or shift in some way. She remained completely motionless. She was past the point where she feared the pain to come. When I saw the bumps where her wings had been cut away, a primal part of me that I thought long-buried twisted in anger. If I ever found the ones who’d mutilated her, I’d make them regret being born.

I finished my circle and came to a stop in front of her. “What is the name on your status window?” I asked her.

She didn’t answer right away. “Is Sir ordering this one to give him such information?”

A faint glimmer of hope made its presence known. It was possible that she’d simply been punished for using the name she’d been born with, but there was also the chance that she held on to the information for personal reasons. That she preferred her owners to use whatever name they gave her, not her true one. One small act of sanctuary for whatever was left of the girl she’d once been.

“No. I’ll need something to refer to you, though.”

“Whatever sir wishes,” she repeated.

“Scarlet will suffice for now,” I told her. The color of her hair and eyes. Hardly creative, but I didn’t want it to be a permanent name anyways. Rhallani was right about the malnourishment, but I wasn’t so certain of the cause. Whoever had done this to her could have been starving her, but it was also entirely possible she’d simply lost the will to live. To keep herself fed.

“This one thanks Sir for the gift of its name.” She bowed her head again. “What does sir want of this one?”
“For now, nothing. I prefer my servants to be well rested and well fed, so I expect you to sleep and eat an adequate amount.”

“Of course, sir.”

Hopefully that would be enough to keep her going until we could rekindle her will. I turned enough to see Rhallani, watching the transaction with rapt attention and more than a little fear. “Will you see to it that she’s fed?”

“Yes,” Rhallani said quietly.

I gestured towards the door, then said to Scarlet, “wait here. Once you’ve eaten, get some rest. Use the bed,” I added as an afterthought.

She regarded the bed with the same disinterest, but I could tell even from the brief look that she wasn’t used to sleeping in such soft places. My heart went out to her. I wanted to try and banish the pain I knew she’d been through, but I knew that this was the best I could do for her right now. I turned and left Scarlet alone in her room. Rhallani waited for me in the hallway.

“Get light food, nothing too rich or greasy. She won’t be able to keep it down otherwise. Make sure she eats a good amount, but don’t let her gorge herself. She might take my order too literally and begin overeating. I’ll need you to keep an eye out and make sure that doesn’t happen.”

Rhallani nodded, then said, “Ren, I’m so—”

I held up a hand to silence her. “We can talk after she’s eaten, alright? I just need to think for a minute.”
She clamped her jaw shut, then turned and headed down the hallway with clenched fists. I wanted to reassure her, but I needed to make sure I wasn’t going to lose it first. I entered our room and plopped down on the bed. I dug the heels of my palms into my eyes and sighed. There was still hope for Scarlet, though these next few weeks would be a very delicate balancing act. What had Rhallani gotten us into?

I didn’t realize how much time had passed until I heard the door open and close, then I felt Rhallani’s weight sink onto the bed next to me. I wanted to reach out and hold her just as badly as I wanted nothing to touch me. “I hope you’re serious about wanting to help her, because I won’t be able to do it without you.

She released a breath. “This mess is my fault, so of course I’ll do whatever you need me to.”

I left my head resting on one hand while I waved the other. “You did the right thing. I won’t fault you for it, it’ll just take me a few days to figure this all out in my head.”

“You don’t have to worry, I’ll take care of her. Just leave everything to me.”

“She isn’t a pet, Rhallani,” I snapped before I could stop myself. I felt her flinch, and guilt piled onto the heap of emotions rolling around in me. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. I’ll leave things to you, but you’ll need to do exactly as I say.”

When I finally dragged my gaze up she was looking at me uncertainly. “I—I think it might be better if I deal with her,” she forced herself to say. “After all, I know what it’s like to be a demi-human in this world.”

I stared at her until she looked away, then started speaking. “The first barrier is going to be touch. You’re going to constantly want to hold her tight and try to make her feel better, but that’s only going to make things worse.” I reached out and put a hand to her cheek, and she leaned into it without even meaning to.

“You were lucky enough to have a sister who loved you. One I’m sure was quick to hug or kiss away all your hurts growing up.” I slowly pulled my hand away, and her cheek followed the touch. “You spent the rest of your life touch starved, and even now you can’t imagine what it’s like not to crave a warm embrace or a soft caress. If there’s love behind the action, you can’t see a scenario where the touch would be unwelcome.”

I could see the wariness in her eyes, but she made no move to refute me. “Now I want you to imagine a different life. One where felt the touch of others plenty, but it was only ever to cause you harm. There was never any sister to hold you tight. Never a father to run to in your darkest nights. The only touch you’ve ever known is pain. The only time another’s hands have ever come near you is to hurt you.”

She swallowed. “Then how can I possibly help her?”

“You have to start slow. Small. Big embraces like hugs or kisses will only frighten and confuse her.” Memories flashed again, and I fought them down. “The only time people have wrapped their arms around her have been to hold her down. The only times lips have touched her skin were lust-driven men doing unspeakable things to her.” Rhallani’s face paled. “Only light touches, and never with any sort of suddenness. Brush against her elbow when you walk up from behind her or past her. Briefly touch a fingertip to her shoulder when you’re talking to her. Let your skin rub against hers ever so slightly when you hand her something. At first she won’t react to them, then she will. When those reactions start to die down a bit, ramp it up, but slowly. We have to very carefully show her that not all touches are bad ones.”

I could see that she’d started wringing her hands in her lap. “Okay, but—”

“And no matter what you do,” I cut her off, “don’t try and sing my praises. Avoid mentioning me at all if you can. Keep things about the two of you unless she brings me up first. I doubt that will happen for a long while, but you never know.”

That made her grimace. “So I can just never compliment you? Not even when we’re in public?”

“That’s fine,” I amended. “When other people are around, her mind will rationalize it. You serve me, and a part of your duties involve protecting my image. That’s what she’ll tell herself, at least. In private, though, if you try and convince her I’m good and kind it will only make it harder for her to trust you. This will be a battle of attrition, and trying to force things will just make her retreat further into herself.”

“Right. I’ll make sure to tell you whatever I can about her as well.”

But I shook my head. “No, don’t betray her trust. If she tells you something bad like she’s planning to harm herself or someone else, then come to me. Other than that, I trust you to deal with whatever information you reveal. We want her to feel comfortable enough to tell me herself, but for us to ever get to that point she’ll need to be able to lean on you. If you go giving away her secrets, especially to me, you’ll alienate her.”

She studied my face for a long while. “How do you know all this?”

I didn’t want to say it, but I knew she’d figure it out eventually anyways. “Because I’ve been through what she has. I’ve been where she is. Maybe not exactly, but close enough.”

There was a brief flash of confusion on her face, but I could see the moment she connected the dots. Her face twisted with horror, but she hid her expression quickly. I watched her, terrified of what her next move would be, but she simply crawled behind me and wrapped her arms over my shoulders and around my chest. “Gods, Ren, I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”

I just took a moment to enjoy the warmth of her. I trailed my fingers down the length of her forearm, and her grip tightened around me. “It was a long time ago.” Technically, that was even true.

“I’m still sorry I put you in this position.”

I didn’t answer right away. “I want you to spend the night in her room tonight.”

She stiffened. “Right. Of course.” Her tone was clipped, and I cursed myself for being an idiot.

I twisted until I could capture her lips with my own. “It isn’t a punishment. I don’t want her to be alone all night, and I can guarantee you she doesn’t want to spend the night with me in the room.” I kissed her again. “We’re okay. Promise.”

She melted into me and we made out for a bit longer. Finally she pulled away. “It’s not normal, by the way.” When I looked at her in confusion, she clarified. “Her wings. I know we haven’t talked about how the Accords affect the other races, but clipping wings is still very illegal. If anyone ever found out who did it, the consequences would be severe. That poor Seraphim.”

That made me feel a little better, and I appreciated she’d thought of my feelings on the matter. “Thank you. You’re wrong, though. Scarlet is no Seraphim.”

She frowned. “She has to be. Her wings are too high to be a Succubus, and she can’t be a Drakken without scales.”

I smiled in spite of everything. My lovely little scholar. “I know. What do you know of demi-humans? Of their origins, I mean.”

It only took her a second to recall the information. “Well, a few thousand years ago, the world was populated with the primogenitor races. Angels, demons, dragons, fae, and others. Humans were comparatively weak, but they had children faster than any of the magical races, so they were universally enslaved. Then the gods gave us the Class System, and we had the power to fight back. There was a big war that killed many on both sides, then peace. Humans turned out to be very compatible with nearly all the other races, and demi-humans were born.”

“I’ve seen a beast with her coloring before,” I admitted. It had been a monstrous bastard that Grimsbane summoned during that final battle. Something not of this world. It had nearly killed us, and after everything was said and done our wizard, Bennet, had sworn he’d uncover just what the hell it was we’d killed. I needed to track him down and see if he was successful. “I’d never heard of it before, but it was powerful. Powerful enough to be considered on par with the legends of the primogenitors.”

I could practically feel her vibrating against me. “Ren, are you saying you think the girl in the other room might be a new type of demi-human?”

“That’s exactly what I think.” And if whatever beast had sired her was from the plane where this other god was coming from, the more I could learn about it the better. If I didn’t think Rhallani’s skill evolution had been Allura’s doing before, I sure as shit did now. I summoned two blank leather-bound books and held them up. “If only we knew someone scholarly who might be interested in documenting this potentially new race—”

She snatched the books out of my hand, excitement replacing everything else. She peppered me with kisses until we were both laughing on the bed. “You’re amazing, Ren,” she said to me. “But why are there two books?”

I couldn’t give her the full reason without revealing even more about myself than I already had, so I’d give her the half truth I’d decided on when I bought them. “It’s going to sound a little strange, but I want you to do something for me.”

Her smile was so radiant it chased away most of the darkness I still felt in me. “Anything.”

“I want you to record the monsters we meet out in the world. Draw them, describe them, list their strengths and weaknesses, everything. Consider it practice.”

“For Scarlet?”

“For now, yes.”

Her eyes glimmered at the unspoken challenge. I’d put another mystery in front of her, and she was more than happy to sink her teeth into it. She kissed me again. “Thank the gods fate put me in your path,” she breathed after.

I flinched involuntarily at how unintentionally accurate that was. If she noticed, she didn’t show it. “Be careful with her. I’d help her regardless of her race, but she could be more important than either of us realize. And give her one of these.” I handed her one of the healing potions I’d bought. It had been expensive due to the low stock of the small town guild, but just thinking about how much pain Scarlet was probably in meant it wasn’t even a choice.

She stood up, clutching the books to her chest. “I will. And Ren, thank you. For saving me. For not hating me. For everything.”

I smiled. “Go on, we can talk more in the morning.”

She turned to leave, but paused at the door. I could tell by the way she held her shoulders that she wanted to ask something but was afraid to. Just when I thought she’d give up and leave, she turned back. “Ren? If you don’t mind me asking, who was it that saved you? That pulled you out of… whatever hell Scarlet is in right now?”

I was surprised to find that I wanted to tell her. I wanted to tell her everything. From Allura to Karn. I decided that I would, eventually, but for tonight I could at least answer her question. “Her name was Eliya.”

Her hand was still on the knob, but she didn’t open the door just yet. “What happened to her?”

“She died in my arms.” And I’d been powerless to save her.

Her jaw clenched, but she just nodded. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

After she left, I couldn’t help but think how grateful I was she didn’t try to say “I’m sorry.”