Shades of the New World

Chapter 15: Authority

A dozen lifetime's worth of despair and loneliness filled his entire being, obliterating his carefree thoughts, leaving behind only the cold anguish in its place.

But instead of breaking down like he would normally do, his existence felt sharpened and determined. He wanted to escape! To never feel such things again!

Feeling like he was standing on the edge of a cliff, with nothing but cold hard boulders behind him. Threatening to push him off. To push his sanity over the edge. There were hundreds of voices telling me to persevere, to push back the boulders behind him. Claw your way through the rocks if you have to, just make sure you don't fucking fall.

Evin followed the voices' commands and fought against the pressure. He hoped that the pressure from the World will fall with time, but his hope was doomed to shatter soon after.

Among the voices that told him to persevere, a voice in there somewhere kept saying that he should just fall. Leave everything to fate and live on as some mad child, blabbering on about some made up world called Earth. His sharpened mind was losing its edge quickly, constantly dulled by the weight of depression and the occasional blows from these voices.

The World's pressure was immense and unyielding. It threatened to drown Evin's thoughts, trying to replace it completely with a disheartening form of manic depression.

Evin's counterattack was also immense and unyielding. But unfortunately, it was finite and weary. Before the gate of sanity in his head broke down, Evin let his thoughts wander freely as an attempt to distract himself from the pressure.

'Sure, I live as a madman, free of worry and pain. Only caring about perfecting my inner bubble. But what will I do after I die? But what happened after I die? Spend another 300 hundred years dead and hope for another 'god' to take notice of me?'

'No. I can't'

'I'll burn this damn World down to its roots, if that helps me see a way to save myself from that outcome!'

'But what am I supposed to do?'

Some part of him understood that he just had to leave the World, but his instincts told him he would surely lose control during that lapse of concentration.

'Leaving the World is, for some fucking reason, extremely hard when I'm under pressure from the World'

If Evin did nothing, he could persist for a bit. But eventually, he would have to succumb to the madness. Or he could try leaving, and maybe he will have a 5 percent chance of succeeding.

'Honestly, five percent isn't that bad. That's basically one in twenty! And honestly, even if the chance of successfully leaving was 50 percent, I'd still be shitting my pants here'

'Wait, how do I even know it's five percent, anyway. It's just some number I found likely. Icould try leaving, but the chance might have been zero percent and he would have been oblivious to it. Well, honestly, I'd probably be too insane to care at that point'

'Silver lining, though, is that I'm probably getting used to the pressure of the World, if I'm getting the leisure to joke around'

Evin found that letting his thoughts wander helped him greatly in distracting himself from the World's pressure. He felt proud of himself, thinking of such an ingenious solution during such dangerous moments.

He soon realized that the pressure was getting much more bearable. It was still there, definitely. But before it was like a mountain, now it seemed like a truck. It was still heavy, but definitely much easier. And it was getting smaller and smaller.

'What the hell is happening?'

A few moments later, the pressure completely disappeared and Evin finally found a chance to let his frail and tired body fall to the ground. Wheezing and sweating.

A minute or so passed until Evin could catch his breath. He sat up to look around and find a gigantic wooden table in front of him.

'By the Empress, that must be the fanciest table I will ever see in my wretched life' Evin thought.

As he dipped his toes in many fields during the long time Evin spent as a specter, he could tell the extent of exquisite craftsmanship that went into this work of art. Every board was aligned to the millimeter next to each other, with each and every one of them sanded down to perfection.

The ornaments on the desk were a mix of Oriental and Western designs. Oriental, because the wood itself creates a nature based shape that depicted a look of natural balance. Western, because the various small decorations surrounding the desk was a mix of minimalist and baroque techniques.

It gave off a conflicting feeling, but nonetheless, it was interesting to look at.

But the principal attraction was the base wood, made of some magical material as the grains and random knots on the wood showed what looked to be an electrical current running through them. Sometimes, random sparks appeared, and a popping sound entered Evin's ears.

A calming sensation filled the weary soul, similar to how one would feel when watching the crackling of fire.

As much as Evin loved to keep staring at the table, his attention was drawn to the man sitting behind the desk.

A man with sharp features stared at Evin with an expression that was a weird mix of curiosity and indifference. Like the man had finally found something interesting, but could not help but think it would disappoint him again, like all the other things that grew uninteresting to him over time.

He wore a jacket with some dark-colored embroidery over a white collar, with a similar styled suit draped over his shoulders. He really looked like some mafia boss from a movie. And instead of those wannabes, who would look like kids wearing oversized clothes, the look suited the man to the tee.

'Funny how he would look like some mysterious bartender in a rundown bar with only his jacket, while if he wore his suit, he would just look like a notably hot middle-aged man,' Evin thought.

But Evin supposed that the man would find it hard to look normal with his sharp glare that emitted that a dark purple glow like some kind of phone screen.

'Why the hell does everyone in this world have shiny eyes, shiny stones, and shiny fucking wooden desks?!'

'Why is he wearing a suit in the middle ages, anyway?!'

'If you're going to make me go through this another world bullshit, at least do it properly!'

'And where did this desk came from anyway?! Did you fucking carry it here to look cool?!'

Evin's playful side reappeared, as if that desperate situation that he had just experienced was nothing more than a bad dream.

Oblivious to the child's inner conflict, the man broke the silence in the World.

"Welcome to my World, little guest from Earth. I am named Two Tales"

'The World Authority? Wait, he knows I'm from Earth!' Evin thought, creasing his brows.

Without minding the child, Two Tales continued.

"I'll keep it short, don't bother speaking. Normally I would show up before you when you become a much stronger mage, or at least become much more proficient in the magic of my World. But sadly, old protocols can't keep up with new circumstances.

As you've seen, the Worlds draw out certain emotions from deep inside you. The Storm brings out your desire to be free. The Light shows your desire to be acknowledged and loved, while Space reminds you of your sense of belonging in a place.

And sadly, my World draws out the deepest despair and pressure that lives in the subconsciousness of its guests. For someone like you, it's practically your worst enemy.

But us Authorities are fair. Especially me and Twelve Jokes. The others show bias towards their kin, but it is at an acceptable rate.

I will grant you a benefit until you are 15 years old. Until then, you will feel pressure from the Worlds only from the events that happen in Alvox. Your memories from Earth shall not affect your experience here.

You must have many questions. But I'm afraid you will have to find the answers yourself.

But... well, it mostly depends on your choices.

I hope we meet again. Now rest"

Without giving Evin any chance to utter a word, with a dismissive glance from his eyes, he sends the child back to Aran's house again.

Evin wanted to get up, but he was too tired to do so.

The familiar scent of Liza's cooking enters his nose. Voices of his mother sounded like warm melodies to his ears. Evin felt safe in the warmth of his surrounding environment. Not the incomplete way he usually feels, but truly safe.

With his eyelids feeling like the heaviest things in the universe to him, blissfully, he passed out on the living room floor.

'Feels almost nostalgic' was his last thought before he fell into dreamland.