Redo of a Romanceless Author’s Life Devoid of Love; Another Chance at Youth

Chapter 101.

Chapter 101. Christmas Day (5/6)

Once Chris received his presents from everyone it was everyone else’s turn to receive theirs. Somehow, people usually watched the youngest open their presents first before they got to their own. It was strange how things often turned out that way. 

Alicia received some new trendy clothing from her mother as a present. Rosa gave her a friendship bracelet. With how much Alicia valued friendship, she was moved to the point she wanted to cry. She hugged Rosa tight and immediately out on the bracelet. As for her little brother, he gave her some of her favorite sweets from a bakery he’d gone to together with his mother. Alicia graciously received all her presents with a beaming smile on her face.

Unexpectedly, Rosa received a present in return from Alicia’s little brother. He gave her some high-quality chocolates. Rosa accepted them and gave him a hug and kiss on the cheek while doting on him while she complained about not having a cute little brother like him. Alicia gave Rosa a pair of earrings. They weren’t anything expensive, but they matched Rosa’s image well. Rosa already had her ears pierced so it was a rather thoughtful present. Irene ended up giving Rosa something as well. But she was rather discreet with what she’d given her. I managed to take a sneak peek at what it was. A bottle of…birth control pills. I nearly flipped a table but Rosa seemed strangely happy when she verified what they were.

Hey, at least make it condoms instead damn it! Don’t go promoting it raw! That shit’s not safe! She’s a first-year in high school. Do you not understand that? Wait… is it because I said she was a nympho? Was Irene worried if she gave condoms she might not use them?

What the hell… I didn’t know how to feel.

Rather, you should be advocating to not do such things. Don’t go and encourage it. Though… it was probably better if she did have something like this than not having anything at all just in case some sort of accident were to happen I guess. 

Ahhhh. I’m so confused over how I should feel about this.

Irene’s presents consisted of a coffee mug from her son that said ‘World’s Best Mother’ on it. Her daughter’s present was a specialized pillow that was used to improve sleep. Such a thoughtful daughter, if I could cry, I would. Rosa came up with a present as well, a gift card to a spa. 

Damn it, what was with all these thoughtful presents? How were they so damn prepared for Christmas? Stupid normies, now I look even worse!

As for me, I got coal from Chris. I nearly whacked him in the head when I saw the innocent look on his face. ‘Devils can use coal to fuel their power, right?’ That was what he asked me with his eyes.

Alicia gave me some homemade cookies. She probably didn’t want to give me something material because she was being mindful of my relationship with Rosa. Rosa gave me... money.

I dropped to my knees and gave her a deep respectful bow. Thank you my Goddess of Fortune for blessing me on this day with the thing I need the most to survive on a day-to-day basis rather than some useless material possession. Bills aren’t cheap. A man needs to eat as well. I may be moving in here and paying less, allowing me to save some extra money, but saving money for the rainy days is my greatest concern in life.

When it rains, it pours. The troubles in life just come in endless waves. You think you’re fine one moment, and the next day you wake up in the morning and your car won’t start. Turns out your battery died in this god-forsaken shit hole city and you have to replace it because it was minus fucking fifty below. Or perhaps some jackass hits your car and you end up needing to cover the deductible for the repairs. Ahhhh, life has truly sent endless waves of bullshit my way as an adult. 

You’d be shocked by how many unexpected expenses can come up in life all at once and just how fast things can go to the shitter.

As for Irene, similar to the way she gave Rosa her present, she slipped me mine when nobody was looking. I was a bit curious about what it could be. I mean, if she gave Rosa birth control pills, would she give me the condoms then? Was I expected to be the responsible one in the relationship?

But when I saw what it really was I was at first confused. They appeared to be handmade coupons. Similar to what she suggested I give to others.

When I read through these coupons my eyes shot open wide in shock. They were all… sexual favors. Blowjobs, handjobs, titjobs, anal, to vaginal intercourse. Every possible thing she could think of had a coupon I could redeem at any point in time. All the different kinds of sexual positions were even listed on individual coupons. There was also a ridiculous coupon that read, ‘Fuck until I’m crying and begging you to stop.’ 

One coupon even read, ‘Fulfill any sexual fantasy you desire with me.’ It was an anything-goes coupon. It even said it was redeemable as many times as I wanted for this one unlike the others, making me question the need for the others in the first place. I could literally throw the others out and just keep this one and I’d be set for life. I guess they were just there to give me ideas of everything she’s willing to do and more.

What the hell was with this present!

She whispered in my ear, “To pay you back for how much you’re doing for me with your Christmas present, it’s only natural I give you something of equivalent value, don’t you think? If you’re ever feeling sexually frustrated, feel free to use me if your girlfriend is unable to relieve you.”

She’s a vixen. An absolute vixen.

I didn’t even have a chance to respond as she’d immediately backed away after she whispered that directly into my ear. 

I stuffed the coupon book she forced on me deep into my pocket. There was no way I could let anyone see this sort of dangerous incriminating Christmas present. It was a ticking time bomb just waiting to explode.

There was no way I could possibly use this. But just having it made my mind wander on its own. I gulped nervously as I snuck a peek at Irene’s attractive figure from behind. There was an undeniable temptation.

With that, everyone had given out their presents… except for me. Ahhhhh, I should have just given it to them first. Stalling has just made this awkward for me.

Rosa was constantly glancing my way obviously waiting to see what she’d receive from me. Alicia was similarly curious what sort of present her best friend would receive for Christmas. Was a proposal really not enough? Did I really have to give her this embarrassing present?

I took out the coupon book I’d prepared in my back pocket. Since I was overly conscious of Irene’s… Christmas present, I double-checked to make sure I had the correct coupon book I prepared last night. 

I read through them and verified they were all normal activities like date coupons, meet-up coupons, and other coupons listing a variety of simple little actions I could perform for her. There was also a special coupon that she could use to make any request of me, but there was also a stipulation in the fine print. The request from this coupon could not add any additional women to my list of troubles in any way, shape, or form, and the request couldn’t involve any woman other than Rosa. I had to be safe and cover all my bases here.

When she saw what I’d taken out, she raised a brow curiously.

“This is your present. Coupons you can redeem at any time from me. For example, if you want a date, you redeem one. If you want a shoulder massage, you can redeem that. If you want me to meet up somewhere you think I wouldn’t want to go for some reason, you can redeem it to make me go there no matter what. If I don’t fulfill the coupon after it is redeemed, the penalty for me will be that you can get a new special ticket. This special ticket allows you to make any request of me, but there are conditions associated with the request ticket in the fine print that you can read later.”

I handed the coupons over to her. When she heard the explanation her eyes lit up. She looked quite content with her present.

“Thank you very much. This is exactly what I needed the most. Oh, but this condition for the special ticket is quite specific… well, it’s really not a big deal. It should come in handy on Valentine’s Day, I’ll be sure to make good use of it for myself in the future so look forward to it~”

The way she said that made me instantly feel regret. Had I overlooked something? What was it? I thought it over for a bit, but no matter how I thought about it, I should be safe. I couldn’t see a loophole she could make use of with the special ticket. If she broke the conditions of use, it would void the request and I’d ignore it.

“I’m glad you like it. I was worried you wouldn’t and would want something material instead.”

“This is plenty for me. The thing I love the most is my boyfriend, if my boyfriend is presenting himself to me on a silver platter and I’m free to do whatever I want with him, I’m more than happy to take advantage of it.”

“Please go easy on me.”

“Hmph, after today? You expect me to go easy when you showed no mercy at all today?”

“It was payback for yesterday’s crushing defeat. I came out swinging.”

“You may have won today, but the battle has already been decided. You are destined to lose. There is no way for you to win now. All the pieces are already in place. It’s just a matter of time. Even if it takes a few more months, it’s not a big deal.”

Having dropped those ominous words, she said no more. How? She said a few months… meaning Valentine’s Day. But why is she so confident about Valentine’s Day? What does she have planned?

With so few hints available to me at this time, there wasn’t much I could do. I could only come up with appropriate countermeasures when the time came.

Yes, I’d deal with that when it was time. For now, I had another matter to take care of, the final present. The last person I had to deliver a present to was… Alicia.