Chapter 43 - Uncertain & Stressful
There were quite a few things running around in Xu Mey’s mind when she left the house in the morning.
Her head was like: "What’s up with that kiss? And those sugary words?"
Her heart was like: "It was a way to show that he cares." Xu Mey’s heart again skipped a beat without any prior notice.
Her head was again like: "Is he giving mixed signals?"
Her heart was like: "No, you stupid. You’re just having second thoughts... AGAIN!"
Xu Mey parked her motorbike at a secluded place and knocked her head with her knuckles. She was frustrated. And the worst part was; She didn’t even know why she was frustrated in the first place.
They are right when they say: ’Uncertainty is the most stressful feeling.’
Xu Mey was both: Uncertain and Stressful.
The feeling when you don’t even know what you’re feeling is a damn f*cking feeling.
She remembered a saying at this moment: ’If he loves you, you’ll know. If he doesn’t, you’ll be confused.’
Which means if he loved me I’d have known by now but he doesn’t love me that’s why I’m so damn confused. Right? Right.
She joined her fist with her other hand’s palm as she concluded in her mind. Now, there was only one answer to her weird behavior; there was something wrong with her heart.
She put back her helmet and got on the motorbike. But instead of taking the right turn which was the way to her office building, she took the left turn leading her to...
The Hospital.
At the hospital, she went through ECG, Blood Test, Chest X-Ray and even CT Scan but when the doctor concluded there was nothing wrong with her heart, she didn’t believe a word.
"You went through all the tests and the result is before you. But if you’re still insisting there is something wrong with you, why don’t you explain in detail?" The doctor was a tall man in his late forties but he was very handsome even at this age.
"I’m telling you something is wrong because my heart just skips a beat whenever it feels like it." Xu Mey replied is an obvious kind of way.
Dr. Zhu Chen nodded his head like an experienced doctor trying to understand his patient. He recently came back to China from the Country F. He was a renowned cardiothoracic surgeon. But today, he was helping an old friend by just seeing some common patients. Who knew Xu Mey would be the first one.
"Can you explain further? Like when it started? How did it start? And what do you really feel when it happens?" He was very professional with his questions.
"Today is the third day. Before this, it never happened. It started when my husband talked to me about our wedding night during the ceremony." She tilted her in thought. "And now it’s becoming a habit. When he talks or just come close to me, this stupid heart skips a beat or does that annoying ’thump’ ’thump’ sound. It’s so loud that I’m afraid, I’ll be stone deaf soon enough." Xu Mey explained so calmly that it was hard to say whether she was telling the truth or just messing around. Her expression was as if her heart’s reaction was a mystery to her.
Dr. Zhu pursed his lips trying hard not to laugh at his patient’s explanation. But rather than finding her to be annoying or a nuisance, she seemed adorable to him.
"You’re an odd one." He commented.
"You have to be odd to be at the top." Xu Mey replied with a straight face. Dr. Zhu was amused just listening to her. "Dr. Seuss once said: ’You have to be odd to be number one.’"
Dr. Zhu’s gaze held admiration for her. She’s not that old but she seems strong. ’A person with an easy past can never be strong.’ She must have been through her personal hell to turn into the person she is today. But she’s really ignorant about love.
"Let me teach you some breathing techniques. It’ll help you a lot." He couldn’t just tell her about why her heart was skipping a beat around her husband. It was something she needed to discover herself.
Even if he told her, she won’t understand it at all. Love can’t be explained in words. It can only be felt and that too with your heart.
He taught her some breathing techniques which she picked up very smoothly. "Try drinking Hibiscus Tea or Lemongrass Tea. It’ll help you a lot." He offered his expert suggestion.
"Thanks, doctor. But are you sure, that I don’t have an arrhythmia?" She was still suspicious.
"Yes, I’m sure." He replied with a faint smile.
"How sure are you?"
"Very sure."
"How sure is very sure?"
He didn’t get angry at all. "100%"
Xu Mey nodded. "Oh well, I can only trust you. Okay then. I’ll be leaving now. Thanks once again, doctor." She closed the door behind her politely.
"What an interesting young lady." Dr. Zhu chuckled thinking about Xu Mey.
With a sullen face, Xu Mey walked out of the hospital. She was supposed to be happy about being healthy but she was gloomy instead.
The reason was very simple. If it had been an arrhythmia, her confused mind would have been at ease. But now the confusion was back with a loud bang.
She was getting on her motorbike when her cellphone rang. She pulled the phone out of her jacket. It was Li Qiao’s call.
"Hi, Qiao!" Her voice was dull and Li Qiao could feel it.
"Mey-Mey, are you alright?" He asked anxiously.
"Yeah, I’m fine." She replied.
Li Qiao heard an ambulance siren from her side and his heart started beating like a drum as he abruptly stood up from his revolving chair. "Where are you?"
"Me? I’m at the hospital." Her short sentence fell like lightning on Li Qiao as the coffee mug in his hand fell down breaking into tiny pieces.