Life in Vain: Jobless Reincarnation

22 – Young Child – Setting off

The morning after Roxy left, I got up, washed my face and then headed over to her room. But halfway there, I stopped, remembering that she was gone.

"Right... I graduated."

After casting <Cumulonimbus>, I was officially a Saint-ranked Magician. The creme de la creme of magic users. And on paper, I was on the same footing as Roxy- No, as my Master. She had nothing left to teach me... so she left.

But I wasn't. Not really.

I could still remember it. That complete ease she had in controlling Cumulonimbus. The way that she went about and directed each part of it like a conductor, perfectly manipulating each part-

Ah. Except for when that lightning bolt hit Carravaggio and almost killed the horse. But that was because Roxy was lost in thought about leaving too, so it didn't count.

Staring at the empty room, I sighed.

At that time, a voice echoed. My dad's. "Oh?"

I turned around and saw him walk out of his room.

He was already dressed for the day, wearing his usual long-sleeved shirt and pants, along with his sword sheathed at his left side.

I gave him a half-hearted wave and said, "Morning, Dad."

"You're up early, Rudy- Oh." He shifted his gaze to the door in front of me and chuckled. "Suffering from heartache already, huh, kiddo?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." I quickly turned away from the door and started walking outside.

My dad laughed and then followed after me. Wrapping his arm around my shoulder, he said, "Cheer up, Rudy. The first one always holds a place in your heart, but there'll be plenty of other girls out there to heal the heartache. You just gotta find them."

I rolled my eyes and brushed off his arm. "It's not that, Dad. I like Master, but not like that."

"Really now. She told me that she'd wait a couple years for you, but I guess I should tell her-"

"Master said what?!"

My dad grinned.

I blinked and then kicked him in the shin.

"Gah! What was that for?!"

"You're a jerk, Dad."

Dammit. Can't believe I fell for that. And what was I even thinking? Roxy's much older than me anyway... It wasn't like she'd be interested in a kid like that. Even if she was, the age difference would be a bit awkward.

...And now I'm thinking of dumb stuff again because of Dad.

I sighed and headed back to my room.

"Where are you going, Rudy?"

"I'm going to grab my book, my wand, and then go exploring."

My dad blinked. "Exploring?"

"Yes. Exploring." I walked into my room and started prepping. "I think I need some fresh air for once."

"Ah. Don't want to be reminded of your cute Master. I got it, Rudy."

"I hate you, Dad."

"You didn't deny it."

I grabbed the scarf that Miss Lilia made for me and wrapped it around my neck. After that, I picked up my wand and the healing primer. Staring at my sword, I was tempted to grab that as well... but I wasn't comfortable enough to use it properly. I decided to just leave it behind.

Besides, if things got hairy, I could make a sword with ice magic using <Ice Blade>.

My dad was still waiting outside of my room when I finished prepping. Seeing that, I sighed and said, "Don't you have anything better to do, Dad?"

"Nope! It's my day off today. I figured that my son would be heartbroken and told everyone I'd spend the day to cheer you up."

"...You know. Sometimes I wonder why Mom even bothers with you, Dad."

"Ouch! I'm not *that* bad."

"So you know that you're bad."

"Guilty as charged. Which is why you should be better."

I rolled my eyes.

My dad smiled. But then his face turned serious and said, "But Rudy. Are you really fine? I know that saying goodbye for the first time is pretty painful, so if you want Dad to do anything to cheer you up..."

Ah. Right. Dad really didn't know how to be serious. Him cracking jokes was just his way of trying to lighten the mood.

Realizing that, I gave him a genuine smile. "Thanks, Dad. But I'll be fine."

Yes. This was just a passing phase anyway. Puppy love was like that. It was just this growing body's reaction to someone who I was close to and admired. That was all.

So to get past that... Yep. Let's get busy.

My dad stared at me and then let out a soft smile. He patted my shoulder and said, "You'll get through it Rudy. Remember, time heals all wounds... and distance makes the heart grow fonder. If you really want to win Miss Roxy over then just grow super strong and wow her when you meet again."

"And I told you, it's not like that... but thanks Dad." I waved at him and said, "I'm heading off now."

"Alright, Rudy. Have fun- Wait! Where are you going?"

"Around. Don't worry. If something happens, I'll send up a signal flare. And I'll be back by dark."

"Er... Stay out of trouble?"

I waved my wand and left.

Now... there should be monsters in the forest, right?

-LIV-

Paul scratched the back of his head and then let out a sigh. Watching Rudy's small form wander off in the distance, he frowned and said, "Is this really fine...?"

Rudy had never wandered far from the house. Then again, he never had a reason too.

But it would be fine. Rudy had really good combat intuition. His son might only be above average with a sword, but in terms of magic...

Advanced-ranked magicians of a single element were already rare enough. Saint-ranked magicians were rarer still.

And his son was a jack of all trades that could use all spells at Advanced-rank in every element as well as use a trump card of a Saint-ranked water spell.

There was nothing to worry about. Rudy was smart and knew how to fight. Not only that, but there was no monster around that could hurt him... and even if there was, Rudy could heal himself.

Even so, Paul was surprisingly worried.

Watching Rudy walk off, Paul let out a sigh. "...Dammit."

If Paul was feeling like this after Rudy just went out to play... how did his Dad feel when he left?

Rudy was coming back. And he was strong enough to where it would have to be someone or something that Paul had trouble with to hurt him.

But when Paul left home, he hadn't been like that. Paul was older, yes. Since he left at 12, he wasn't completely helpless.

Even so, Paul left without a single coin to his name, and with just average sword skills. He didn't have the right to hold his head up high without worry. And he had struggled a lot afterwards too.

If Paul was this worried when Rudy was much better off than he had been... Then what about his dad?

...Was that why he died right after Paul left? Did the guilt and regret from the argument affect him that much? Did the worry about whether Paul was still alive finally push the old man over the edge?

Paul remembered. He threw away the Notus name and his noble ties to try and make a name for himself. Because of that, he didn't make contact with anyone from his family... Not until recently when he asked for help from his cousin Philip.

So that meant that his dad never knew. He never knew that Paul was still alive, or that he managed to make a living for himself.

And he died like that. No doubt regretting his decision to the very end and rethinking what ifs. Rethinking what would have happened if he hadn't tossed out that ultimatum.

Paul grit his teeth and subconsciously clenched his hand around his sword hilt.

...It was the old man's fault in the first place. If the guy hadn't tried to force Paul to follow his path-

Ah. But did the old man know any better?

Paul was an only child. Not only that, but there hadn't been anyone to help the old man out. The guy had been working hard every day, but... didn't he also try to spend time with Paul?

That time was in the form of crappy noble etiquette lessons or history... But now that Paul thought about it, the old man enjoyed that sort of stuff. It was all the guy really knew other than the sword.

If Rudy didn't like training... If Zenith and Lilia weren't around...

...Wouldn't Rudy have acted the same way that he did? Called Paul an old man who kept trying to force him to do something he wasn't good at? Start getting annoyed at Paul and then decide that he had enough and run off?

"...Hah." Paul let out a deep sigh and muttered, "I'm really a lucky bastard, aren't I?"

Rudy was different from Paul. His son was kind and patient. Not only that, but he was smart. A real genius, unlike Paul who was really only good at chasing girls and using his sword.

Paul could understand it a bit now. The father that he hated and didn't get along with because he thought they were too different... When it came down to it, the guy was just trying his best.

Like Paul. Except, unlike Rudy, Paul had been an ungrateful bastard who didn't think about his father at all.

Not like Rudy who enjoyed spending time with his parents. Who kept coming back to train with Paul even though he got made fun of him and beat up each time instead of being taught. Who didn't complain when his parents went out to work and just enjoyed the time they had together. Who was happy when they were happy... who panicked because he was worried he couldn't fulfill his parent's expectations.

Because of all that...

"Damn. Guess people really do change when they have kids, huh?"

"Master Paul?" A polite voice called out from behind. Lilia's.

Paul flinched. But he played it off as a yawn and turned around. "Morning, Lilia."

Lilia nodded and then turned to look after Rudy. She raised her hand to block the sunlight from her eyes and then said, "Is the young master going out to play?"

Paul nodded. "That's right. Seems like he's too tired of being cooped up at home... Or he's missing his cute teacher too much."

Lilia sighed and put her hand down. "I hope nothing happens. This is the first time young master set out alone. He's mature and competent, but..."

"It'll be fine." Paul turned to watch after his son's shrinking back and said, "I bet Rudy will come back later today with a bunch of fun stories. Just you watch."

Lilia paused and then let out a warm smile. "Yes. Knowing the young master, he will." Saying that, Lilia turned back to see Rudy off.

Paul glanced over to look at Lilia. And when he did, he froze.

...Paul had never really noticed it until now. But seeing that soft and motherly smile on Lilia'a face instead of her usual carefully crafted expression...

"Beautiful."

Lilia glanced at Paul and then nodded. "It really is, isn't it?" She looked up at the sky and said, "A wonderful day for Rudy's first adventure."

"A-Ah. Yeah." Paul quickly nodded and stared after Rudy. "I hope he has fun."

Dammit, Paul! Stop that! You have Zenith already!

Besides... Didn't you forget?

What you did to Lilia that day... Even if you liked her like that, what you did...

'Well, why don't you take responsibility?'

An idle thought echoing in his head.

Paul stopped to think about that.

'You did with Zenith too, didn't you? And doesn't Rudy like Miss Lilia a lot? Won't he be happy to have two moms?'

...No. Paul couldn't do that. And even if he did, Zenith would never forgive him. Plus, he promised.

'But Rudy likes Lilia more anyway, so does it matter? He spends more time with her than with his real mom. He'll be a bit sad at first, but don't you think he'll be happier?'

That's-

"Master Paul?"

"Ah." Paul shook his head. "Sorry, Lilia. I was... thinking about something. What did you say?"

"I asked if Miss Zenith is aware that Rudy is going out alone?"

Paul froze. "A-Ah. Well-"

"Rudy! Are you okay, Sweetie? Mommy's here to give you a hug if you're sad! ...Rudy?"

Lilia gave Paul a blank stare.

Paul broke out in cold sweat.

...Maybe he should have woken Zenith up first...