God-level Bodyguard in The City

Sorry for the hiatus, I was busy with end of year exams. That said, I’ll be doing this as a side project from now on so expect releases roughly once a month, assuming I’m on my own. My main projects will be editing DSI and scanlating a new manhua(with a “u” not a “w” meaning it’s chinese not korean) called 唐山葬(tang shan zang) which is a parody of

西游记(journey to the west) where the useless monk turns into Saitama and everyone’s favourite monkey king/god becomes a shoujo, scantily clad at that. Oh and this novel will be moved to kobatochandaisuki

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To Tupao Xiong, this series’ first donor. Thanks for donating right from the start. This is the last chap on xxw and it's dedicated to you(not kidding it was originally supposed to go up on kcds) so thanks for the support. If you're still reading this series anyway.

Translator: H0rr1bl3cpu

Editor:H0rr1bl3cpu

Chapter 16 - God’s beautiful angel

Tonight, the busiest places, apart from inside the grounds of 《China’s Wonderful Sound》, were the surrounding internet gambling companies outside. The odds about who would be the champion were constantly fluctuating. After the third song was sung, for the first time, Dream Jade’s odds were lower than Green Tea’s in the ratio 1:0.7. Green Tea’s odds even reached 1:1.5, the highest in history.

This was all because the third song completely exposed Green Tea’s defects in singing. Only then did this delicate fluctuation of odds appear. But gambling was like buying stocks, at all times, it relied on calmly making complex analysis and the right situational control. Being Asia’s biggest gambling group, “Golden Glory[1]” was this round’s offeror[2]. Employing as many as 50 people’s computerized offerees[2], in addition to over 1000 hatchet men from all over the country, they created a huge central systeme[3].

And right at this key moment, there were quite a few professional gamblers who took advantage of the probability of the odds fluctuating to bet a lot of money at one go. Most wanted to grasp their last chance to buy Dream Jade’s stocks. After all, the gap in singing skill was so obvious. However, in these funds, there was an anomaly. Some crackpot weirdo made use of the internet to directly bet 500,000￥ on Green Tea, even the brokers that dealt with orders were shocked.

One had to know, that such a large order normally wouldn’t be placed through the internet. Investors would normally go to somewhere that sold famous wines and find hatchet men to bet as it was safer. Of course if the investor wanted to conceal their identity, then it was a different matter entirely.

The third song ended. It was once again time for Quick Mouth Hua to advertise mid-stream and the singers to prepare. Chen Min finally took off his earphones and stood up.

“What do you want to do?” Asking Chen Min this had already become Xiao Yi’s habit.

“Take a piss.” Chen Min snickered.

Not long after Chen Min left, Green Tea, wearing a white shirt, black pants and black dress hat danced out from backstage in tune with the rhythm of Michael Jackson’s [Billie Jean]. This was her final track and also the sure-kill technique that she had been practicing for half a year without publishing.

Her dance moves followed her teacher, Michael Jackson's former choreographer’s personal instructions, and managed to hold a 98% resemblance to the late king of pop’s. Green Tea’s dance skills were definitely not granted by plastic surgery. Moonwalk, 45° Tilt, Fouetté, En Pointe…… these moves in which even backup dancers weren't up to standard, were mesmerising when done by Green Tea. It was as if she was possessed by the ghost of Michael Jackson.

Anyone with eyes would know that this was definitely Asia’s, or even the world’s best imitation of one of Michael Jackson's dances. Listening to the hoarse shouts and shrill cries over there, one would be able to understand just how 1337[4] Green Tea was.

After the song ended, points were not immediately given. They were to be decided based on SMS votes from the audience there as well as those watching it on TV. Every 100000 votes from different numbers would equal 0.1 points. The first competitor to go on stage would have an advantage. After all, a good enough performance could make audience members who didn't know better grab a phone and give their vote. Even if Dream Jade were to give a better performance afterwards, votes from those numbers would not be counted.

To be able to go up first showed that Green Tea’s backer’s tentacles had already reached out and latched onto the director of the finals…...

Before going up on stage, Dream Jade already knew the ending. But to be a celebrity, one must hold respect for the stage. Even if she were to lose, she still had to sing the last song with a smile.

“Second place, here I come.” Dream Jade took a deep breath and filled her tiny little lungs with air. With a smile on her face, she led her backup dancer up on stage. This was the finale, it absolutely had to be done to the best of her ability.

Seeing the faces of all the instructors filled with regret, it was obvious that Dream Jade’s singing completely blew away Green Tea’s. However, victory still belong to Green Tea in the end. There are times when we can only accept reality. More so when when we have already done our best in an unchangeable reality. This is what life is.

But right when Dream Jade had gotten into position and the music was starting, a “kacha” sound was heard. Then, all the stage lights turned off and even the music was abruptly stopped. The audience on site started whispering. Logic dictates that a live broadcast of such a level should not experience such issues.

The on-site director went mad and shouted into his phone non-stop. “Stage control room! Answer me! What the fuck happened over there?! Did they all die? At least let me hear you pant! Hey!”

A group of security guards also rushed to the security room. However, the door was locked from the inside and there was even a broken toothpick inserted into the keyhole. There was simply no way to open the door.

“Kick it down! Ram it! Blow it up with a bomb! Just open the damn door for me!” The director shouted until his voice was hoarse and he was exhausted.

Ten over bodyguards rammed the iron door one after another. For the sake of sound insulation, the door was made out of an alloy three fingers thick. Forget about stopping bullets, even if a bomb was used, there was no guarantee that it would work on the door which was blocked by 4 speakers that weighed up to 300kg each.

As for the ten over workers that were originally in the room, they were all wrapped into zongzi[5] with duct tape and tossed into a corner. Every single one of them just looked straight at the horrible demon that attacked them which was currently hitting some keys on the keyboard.

Several tens of seconds later, the large screen at the back of the stage suddenly lit up. There weren’t any lighting effects, only a single sentence, “just sing that song you wanted to sing. It was really nice to listen to—— The Man that Trespassed into Your Heart[6]”.

“Annoying bodyguard, is there anything that you don’t dare to do?” Meng Qi, whose eyes were glistening with tears, couldn’t help but laugh. Chen Min was exactly as he said, and understood Dream Jade’s desires better than she herself. With there being no way to continue the fast song and energetic dance, the backup dancers stepped down from stage. Dream Jade carried a guitar on her back and a chair as she walked towards the center of the stage.

“Hey! Where are you? Was the chaos onstage caused by you?” Xiao Yi called Chen Min’s phone and hurriedly said.

“No way~ Like i said, I took a piss~”

“Pee your sister! You’ve been gone for 20 minutes! Is there something wrong with your prostate?!” Xiao Yi said with annoyance.

“Is there something wrong with taking a shit while I was at it?”

“What’s that banging sound? And what’s with people screaming that they’re going to chop you into pieces?”

“There’s only a single toilet[7], and I’ve been squatting for too long. It’s nothing more than a bunch of guys queuing up outside.

“Stop shitting me! Hurry up and get back here! Quit messing around already.” Before Xiao Yi could finish speaking, the other side had already hung up. She really had no idea how to deal with the situation on stage.

Up on the stage, Dream Jade had already become a bar singer. She set up the microphone, sat on the bar stool and held the guitar close to her chest.

“Everyone, I’m really sorry. Someone created a ruckus and ruined the mood. There’s no way to sing that song I was originally meant to sing now, so let me sing a slow song that was recently made instead. Let's all just forget points. And while we’re at it, forget winning and losing. And just quietly listen to me sing《God’s Beautiful Angel》 okay?”

After putting everything down, Dream Jade’s smile became like that of a “girl next door”, and a few words were enough to quieten the noisy venue.

“Back then, I was hurt like you too

Like a fool, I thought I knew what love was

Full of lies, and starting from deception

His sweet nothings sharpened into a knife

I was hurt so bad I wished every man would just disappear

Then someone said I wasn’t god’s blessed beautiful angel

Dreaming too big and just leaving it be

Using time he heartlessly wiped away my past

Who was it that let me see you again

How could there be such an irrational man?

Barging straight into my heart

I know that you’re the one I’m looking for

No matter how painful or tiring things get, the one place i can always rely on

Despite not saying a word of love, we looked like a couple of lovers

You were the haven that was always close by

So I guess it turns out, that I really was that beautiful angel blessed by god.

He didn’t help wipe out every single man,

He just gave the two of us a new beginning……”

Note: I’m not a lyricists and suggestions are not welcome. I’m too lazy to reupload.

What is a nature’s gift? Nature’s gift is a sound, world or person that could make a sound stay in your heart. Dream Jade’s song gave vent to the dissatisfaction she had towards the past few years. It had decadence, it had hatred, it had disappointment, but at the end, it was filled with warmth and redemption.

Yes, life is like a play. Who could have a level road from birth to death? In life, there would always be some things that make us unhappy. In love, one would always meet a couple of bastards. However, misfortune isn’t the end. If we just believe that we are beautiful angels blessed by god, there will definitely be a day, when that unreasonable man or woman barges into your heart and gives you a new beginning.

It ended with a slow song accompanied by a guitar. Everyone on-site sank into a dead silence. With over tens of thousands audience completely mute, the silence was oppressive. Not even the instructors said a word.

“It’s over……” Wu Neng, who is mingling in the VIP area, stopped watching, turned around and left the group of wooden chickens at his side.

Alien Wang[8] who was sitting down on the instructors’ chairs, stood up and exclaimed, “I know, that for this round I don’t have the authority to give points, but I still want want to say out the points in my heart, which is a 10! The trending rules can go to hell! The gorgeous special effects can join them there! This is what a song should be. A melody composed with all of one’s heart, lyrics summing up one’s life, and music performed using emotions. Only this can be called a song!

Dream Jade! You are god’s blessed beautiful angel. Tonight, I swear allegiance to you”

Alien Wang dramatically fell on one knee and acted like a knight saluting his king towards Dream Jade. Moreover, as soon as he started, there was no way to stop the crowd from cheering. Even people went in holding Green Tea’s backstage passes started shouting.

There were people who laughed until they cried and people who cried until they laughed. The 呢喃[9] new song, was like a knife that stabbed into everyone’s hearts. It let everyone remember the Dream Jade from many years ago, the pure and simple girl whose songs were nice to listen to. Letting go of her obsession with winning and losing allowed her songs to return to what they originally were. Afterwards, quantity became quality.

The internet and on-site voting started and Quick Mouth Hua announced the rules. Only SMSs and on-site votes within 10 minutes would be counted. For sms votes, 10 thousand votes is equal to 0.1 points, whereas for on-site votes, 1 thousand votes is equal to 0.1 points. Following the usual rules, in such a short time, the SMSs would received would usually only be within 70~800 thousand.

However, not everything could be judged with common knowledge. The music company behind Green Tea crazily spent over 50,000,000¥ for the last round, but when facing the listeners which were like an ocean, this was like using a cup of water to put out a burning car. Dream Jade, this beautiful angel, roused too many viewers who watched the talent show but have never voted before. Within the short 10mins, most of the audience members voted for Dream Jade.

And on-site, Green Tea’s SMS votes added up to roughly 1.1million. But Dream Jade had…… 6.7million!

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[1]金耀:金-gold/golden could also refer to money. 耀-light(the one made of photons) glory brilliance etc.

[2]开盘者and电脑接盘人员 respectively. Just some business law jargon that made me search the internet for 2 hours…

[3]外围体系

[4] 屌 slang for cool but the original meaning is penis.

[5]https://www.google.com.sg/search?client=ms-android-htc-rev&hl=en-US&oe=utf-8&safe=images&q=%E7%B2%BD%E5%AD%90&source=browser-type&qsubts=1477034737151&devloc=0

[6]Another way this can be read is Trespass the Man in Your Heart. I’d like to point out that trespassing is a VIOLATION of privacy. *wink wink nudge nudge* ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[7]The squatting kind not the toilet bowl kind

[8]I made a mistake in last chap and mistranslated him as ”contestants, celebrities and instructors“ don’t ask how i got that ask my chinese consultant(xxw’s admin) how he got that cuz that’s what he said. Case and point, he’s one of the judges/instructors(same thing I just alternate given the situation when I’m not too lazy)

[9] I have no idea what this means. Here’s the raws 有人笑着流泪，有人哭到笑了。一首呢喃的新歌，就像刀子一样插进了每一个人的心窝。让大家记忆起了多年以前的梦琪，就是那个干净简单唱歌很好听的女孩。放下对胜负的执着，让歌还原成本来的模样，然后，质变引发的是量变。