Broker

Chapter 116

Lillian rushed through the camp, past the dojo, past the common building. She wasn’t even sure where she was going, it was like something in her just wanted to go somewhere. It didn’t make sense, but it didn’t have to make sense. She let the feeling carry her away as her mind reeled and spun, her thoughts a jumbled mess trying to splice back together only to come unwound and the process repeat. Her head hurt, her chest hurt, her muscles burned, her mind screamed at her as the dots connected in her brain.

They couldn’t see it, not the way I could see it, Lillian thought as her legs worked. She hopped over an obstacle that she barely noticed, she grabbed onto a tree limb and swung forward, accelerating. They couldn’t feel it the way I felt it. She felt the homing instinct, whatever it was, ease as she slid to a stop. Only then did she look around. She was standing among the trees, the gentle sounds of nature all around her. She whipped her head around, there was a creek nearby, a little trickle of water adding to the noise. A bird sang above her head and she looked up at it. It looked down at her and their eyes met.

I could see it, really see it, the clouds of mana gathering over teacher. I could see them sparking, I could feel the process. It wasn’t artificial, it wasn’t like when someone used their abilities. It was… Her heart pounded and her head hurt again, she gripped at her skull and shook her head. That doesn’t make any sense! She thought, It’s insane. It’s completely insane! She looked back up at the bird, it had been joined by another that stood next to it and watched her intently. She shook her head and looked down at her feet. Mana is strong in the air here. Big concentration, almost enough to make a monster.

She furrowed her brows, How do I know that?

She sat down in the lotus position, her hands on her knees. She had to clear this up in her head, it was swirling in her mind and demanding attention. She only hoped, she only prayed, that it didn’t take too long. Snow’s waiting for me, it’s tonight. I can’t be late. She took a deep breath, all the way, filling her lungs and tried to clear her mind. She pushed the clutter away. Only the facts. She took another deep breath. What do I know? What do I see? What do I feel?

She closed her eyes and let her head hang back, power slipped out from her heart as the golden flame worked its way out through her meridians. She felt it go from one point to another, following the channels that teacher had helped her clear. She clenched her fists, I saw it. I saw what happened with teacher’s tribulation. I saw the clouds. I could physically see them.

She exhaled, a long breath coming out of her. She couldn’t see the golden flames that leaped from her lips. She breathed in again and flames drew up into her nostrils.

What did teacher say? Think about the flash?

She let the memories flow, The flash happened, light across the world. Powers awakened, then monsters appeared. She thought, tilting her head a little and frowning. Monsters didn’t happen right away, right, I remember, it took a minute or two for it to start. She thought, Powers happened almost immediately, people were hit with the flash and they just changed. She opened and closed her hands, another exhale of golden flame, another inhale of golden flame. She could hear the birdsong nearby and let her head roll a bit on her shoulders, Animals don’t have abilities. How does mana differentiate? Does it? No that’s not the point.

Humans differentiate, she thought firmly and felt movement in her chest. It's not because we’re special or anything, not because of any ‘humans are special’ bullshit. No, it’s just natural for us. We can handle mana, we’re built for it.

Her heart rate increased and she felt the movement inside of her chest increase. The mana was moving slowly through her body, it felt like it was pulling inward, moving in a steady churning motion. She clenched her fists tightly, she could see the clouds, visualize them, feel them. We’re built for it, but why are we built for it? Why are our abilities so recognizable? It doesn’t make any sense but it has to make sense, it has to be the answer because there’s only one rational explanation.

She took another breath and a rush of flames entered her nostrils, she exhaled and a ring of gold formed around her.

Mana is natural. 

The mana in the air kept gathering around her, she could feel its potential for action, for change. It could become anything, a monster, fuel, even a dungeon. It practically sizzled against her skin even as it ran over her like water caught in a whirlpool. It responded to her presence.

It’s a part of nature. The world responds to it as if it should have been there all along.

The flow intensified, the tightness in her meridians and channels eased.

Mana has always, will always, and shall always, exist. It was just locked away somehow. Put away? 

She furrowed her brow. Her mind was moving slowly through the thoughts now, like a lecture to herself. A calm breath eased out of her chest and the golden ring around her intensified in brightness.

Humans adapted to it. It’s in our blood. Our genes. We’ve always been built for it. It was here on earth before us and it will be here long after us.

She reached out for the mana again, a more intimate understanding of it guiding her mind. It was as natural to the world as the air she breathed. It wasn’t something to be afraid of. Now she could feel her mental grip on it growing stronger. She felt her fingers clench even tighter in her lap.

Lillian tugged on the mana around her, gritting her teeth and pulling with all of her might. Come to me! Come to me! Come on! I know it’s possible, I’ve seen teacher do it, felt her do it! I can do it too, I know I can! She clenched her fists tight as the heat inside of her body increased manyfold. She coughed but held on even as something slid down her lip. Hang on, Landrey! She told herself, Breathe!

One more deep breath, and it moved. She felt the flow of mana around her pull in, press against her skin, and slide into her body. She felt it enter her meridians before igniting against the golden flames that permeated her everything. She felt something ache under her skin, she felt her muscles grind, she felt her bones itch. She felt a searing pain around her neck and felt her hair catch fire. Everything was a mixture of pain and exhilaration. She felt her very cells drink in the power that was entering her body for the first time.

There was nothing inside of Pandora’s Box, that’s what teacher learned, the world hasn’t changed at all. It’s been fixed. Like a freakin’ valve, opening the box just turned it back on! Was the box even real?

The loss of mana was a wrongness that had been corrected, Earth had been incomplete until the day of the flash. Hollow. Now it was whole. That was the profound truth. Something that ordinary people could never accept, something that even her mind had been rattled by, but she didn’t understand fully what that meant. What the implications were. Only that it was an unbending fact. That she could accept. But why?

Her brain jolted, and her eyes flew open. A shock of orange light streaming out of them as her blood vessels glowed beneath her skin. Her head was thrown back as her mind expanded, wisdom touching her thoughts and opening her up. She saw things, flashes, images, a time before. Then stars. A pair of all-gold eyes opened in the void and stared down at her. She looked up into a smiling face filled with tears. You? Your ability? Is that it? A hand brushed her cheek. What happened to you? Why did you do it? I don’t understand, everything’s still so confusing. What is-

The vision ended in a rush, everything crashing down into her body in an instant. She let out a gasp and fell forward, gagging. A splash of terrible smelling black stuff came up, it coated her body, it stung her eyes. She retched and fell onto her side to the chime of birdsong around her. Golden flames spread out around her, dancing on the ground but not leaving a single burn behind. It spread across her skin as her vision swam. She tilted her head and looked up weakly at the dozens of birds looking down at her, watching over her. Hawks, songbirds, all kinds stood guard as she felt her consciousness wane.

She grit her teeth, “Get a fucking hold of yourself!” She barked and pushed herself up off the ground. She looked up at the sky and saw that it had begun to change colors. She looked down at herself, filthy, but also more than she’d ever been before. She could feel the mana converting into internal energy inside of her body. She could feel it moving slowly, agonizingly slowly, but it was rotating, just like the whirlwind in her teacher. She cleared her throat and spat out another glob of whatever the hell had come out of her, “Snow’s waiting for me,” She grunted and pushed herself shakily to her feet, maddening truths bouncing around in her head.

She looked around, “How do I get back?” She breathed, “I can’t remember how-”

A screech sounded above her and she looked up at a hawk that stared at her intently. She stared back and it took flight, dipping low for a moment and banking around her before darting off in one direction. She blinked at the fleeing bird before grinning. She bounced on the balls of her feet, “I don’t get it but lead the way!” She laughed and charged after it, “I’m coming Snow!”

–

Snow looked down at herself, the gown was just enough to cover her. It was cold. She reached up and rubbed her narrow arms. Her guts did another flip and she took a centering breath, digging her nails into flesh that had barely seen daylight. She shifted her feet on the table while the doctors moved this way and that. She was surrounded by more equipment than she’d ever seen before in her entire life. There were machines of all shapes and sizes, brought through one of those archway portals. The lab techs were all walking around checking on things. Dr. Da-Som was off to the side, flexing his fingers as a green glow rose off of them.

She rubbed her arms. She’s late.

Dr. Carter seemed to be thinking the same thing. He walked over and put his hands on his hips, a look of concern on his face, “You okay?” He asked, handing her a tablet with the agreement they’d spoken about earlier.

She gave him a frown before looking down at it, she gave it a once over. Just as she remembered, she signed it and passed it back to him with a huff before looking away. She didn’t have her phone on her right now and it was still so hard to pull an illusion together with just her thoughts. She formed a simple image in her mind of a thumbs up. 

Dr. Carter nodded and rubbed his neck, “You wanna keep waiting? She’s-”

Snow frowned at him and with an effort of will changed the thumbs up to a glare, She’ll be here! Snow insisted even if he couldn’t hear her, he could read her face well enough. She felt a shake run up her spine as another chill from the cold air in the room washed over her. That’s all it is, just cold, and maybe some nerves. I’m just nervous. That’s normal, right? She thought, rubbing her arms. That idiot, she’s so late, where is she? Damn it. She got all dozy eyed and darted off to who knows where, Lily you dummy. She squeezed her arms tightly, I need you here, I don’t know if I can do this-

BANG!

The doors to the lab swung open with a crash, the two doctors and their lab techs all looked up in surprise at a very haggard looking Lillian standing in the doorway. She looked like she’d just run through a waterfall or something. Her clothes were completely soaked through and there were a few black stains on her shirt and tube top. She was panting, wide eyed, as her gaze darted around the room. “I’m here!” She barked, “Sorry!” She turned her eyes towards Snow and their eyes met. 

Are her eyes brighter now? Even more orange before, wow, Snow thought numbly, Are those tattoos around her neck? She squinted at the haggard woman, there were indeed some kind of green markings on her throat that branched out like petals or feathers. They moved and shifted on her skin like they were alive. She pushed the thoughts aside, more immediate concerns taking over. She sat up a bit straighter and scowled, crossing her arms. Where the hell have you been? Why are you soaked? Are you okay?

Lillian walked over, wiping her upper lip off only for a towel to get thrown at her from the side and land on her head. Lillian jerked and grabbed at it before looking over at an impatient Dr. Carter, he had a pair of blue lensed goggles around his neck now and had another tech with him, a dark haired man with an intense stare, “You’re tracking water into my lab, and you’re late,” He said with a scowl, “You reek too. You’re lucky one of my techs has a sterilizing ability or I’d have your head," He said testily.

Lillian shrank a little as she brought the towel to her face to dab it while one of the techs let out a sigh and started waving his hands around the room. Snow watched her with amusement, she couldn’t stay mad, whatever had happened had clearly worked. She seemed… different. Not just the tattoos. Her skin had a bit of a warmth to it, her eyes brighter, her hair a little shinier, her face … Snow flushed and cleared her throat before looking away for a moment. She settled her wildly fluttering heart before looking back and instead pinched her nose. She really does smell bad.

Lillian blinked, “Is it really that bad?”

Snow scowled at her, How can you not smell yourself? It's rancid!

Lillian got the meaning of her stare well enough, she grinned a little and scratched her head, “I’ve been running for the past hour, didn’t have time to stop and show-”

“Hold still please,” A grumpy young man said and held his hands out towards Lillian.

Snow watched Lillian turn to look at the tech only to get blasted in the face with a wave of light-blue wind. Snow burst into silent laughter as her girlfriend’s face rippled, her hair flew back and her eyes fluttered at the sudden burst of air. The tech drew his hand down across Lillian’s body before stepping back. Snow sniffed the air again, all gone. Lillian blinked and looked down at herself, baffled, before looking up at the tech, “Hey thanks!” She said brightly, “That was awesome!”

Snow relaxed, the worries gone thanks to Lily’s antics. She smiled up at the taller girl who looked back at her nervously. Lily’s expression shifted to a big grin and she walked over before sitting down in the chair next to the table that had been set out for her.

“I promised I’d be here,” She said, looking Snow in the eyes, “I’m so sorry I’m late.”

Snow felt her chest tighten and she reached out to touch Lillian’s cheek, she smiled before making a pinching gesture with her free hand. Just a little, it’s fine. She slid her hand down and into the bigger hand belonging to the tough young woman she’d spied on during the bus ride. That immediate physical attraction, it had been overwhelming. At first it had just been a craving, a purely physical one. Wanting to get close, to touch, to feel. To lay eyes on someone that was just her type, she’d never experienced that before until the bus ride. 

Then it became a little more than that. The intense sense of comfort that she gave off was relieving for her, it eased the stress that seemed to be Snow’s entire life. That first night when she’d put her head in Lillian’s lap she’d felt more at ease than she’d ever had before. Then it only got worse after that, or better, depending on how she looked at it.

Every single day after the morning that Lillian had fixed her hood, she was constantly on her mind. At first it was just wary thoughts, annoying ones. What’s she doing? How are her classes going? Is she bored? Is she busy? Then it became, I hope she’s eating enough, she’s working really hard. When she had the thought; I can’t wait till dinner. I want to see her. She knew then that she’d utterly and totally fallen. She’d spent a week just watching her from afar, checking, hoping she’s okay with all the effort she was putting in with Black Lotus. 

Then Miss Chernovna tricked me, that jerk. She grinned at Lillian who had no idea what she was thinking. Lillian just smiled back at her with all the warmth of those golden flames of hers. I owe that bully for it, though, it was the kindest prank I’ve ever been a victim of.

Dr. Carter approached them from the side, “We’re all set, unless you’ve got more chaos to stir up?” He asked Lillian.

Lily scratched the back of her head, “Heh, sorry. No, I’ll be good.”

The man nodded, “Alright,” He said and nodded to Snow, “Just relax.”

Snow watched him step away before turning to lay down on the table. A few more nerves worked their way up her stomach, her fingers trembled, the image of angry drunken eyes surfaced in her mind. Then a heat raced through every inch of her body in an invisible wave. She blinked and looked at Lillian, stunned. No flames, no effort, no concentration. Lily just smiled at her, “I’m here.”

Snow squeezed her hand as the fear just washed away. She lay down and Dr. Da-som walked over, his hands alight with pure green light. Over her, the lights hummed and something pink flickered out of existence. She paid it no mind, instead she just savored the warm hand holding hers. Yes you are, and after this, I’ll be there for you too.