Because I Cannot Hurt You

Chapter 501 The only way to survive

Han Guang's eyes ached with tears and her body trembled. She released her shut fist and wiped her cheeks.

"You haven't seen the life that I had to live. I made it that way! I was fed up with this humiliation. I was tired of people treating me like they could stomp their feet at me anytime. I met Mingli in a bar through one of my customers. We got to talking and I learnt that he was from the Han family. So yes, I slept with him and declared I was pregnant! Go hate me if you want, but that was my only way to escape the hell I had been born into."

She chuckled. "Do you think if I hadn't fooled him, he would have even thrown a glance at a woman like me? Our worlds were completely different. He lived in prestige and glamor, and I suffered in hell and filth. I had to secure my future, so I did what I had to! But then what happened? Uncle Huizhong hated me for scheming my way into this house. He never accepted me and he never accepted the son I gave birth to either."

Han Guang laughed as she shed tears. "I always felt vulnerable living here because of my deceit. I always felt threatened because Uncle didn't like me. Han Tian and Han Zongying were the apple of his eyes and where were Mingli and I? Nowhere! That's why I forbade you from playing with Zhiyuan and Zizi! Are you crazy? Zhiyuan is his grandson, and you are just his grandnephew. Xia Liqin was his choice, but I wasn't! No matter how you looked at it, we were at a disadvantage.

So what if I wanted to secure my son's future? I just didn't want you to grovel your head before others like I did for my whole life! I didn't want my son begging for money like his mother had to! I don't care if my methods were wrong. I didn't care if you felt hurt or whatever because I separated you from Zhiyuan and Zizi. I only wanted my son to be at the top! I wanted you to have everything. I pushed you crazily to study hard and get the first rank because I was so dumb I had to drop out of high school. I didn't want people laughing at you like they laughed at me!"

Her eyes reddened as she recalled all the sneers and disdain she had to go through.

"I didn't want people to call my son a failure. And Uncle Huizhong?" She laughed. "What did it matter to him to say that ranks didn't matter? He was smart, his son was too and so was Zhiyuan. They just had the perfect genes. When you have everything, it's easy to say that you don't need something to prosper.

'Hey, I am a topper but you know? Marks don't really matter at all.'

'Hey, I am rich but one really doesn't need so much money to live a comfortable life.'

'Hey, I am beautiful but who cares if one is ugly? It's the heart that matters, not looks.'

But what happens, Keung? In the end, everybody chooses a smart, rich and beautiful person to associate with. And the dumb, poor and ugly people are bullied and humiliated at every step of the way!

A man like Uncle Huizhong who could top the class even if he had not cheated says that marks are garbage? Tell that to a woman like me who was rejected at every job interview only because she failed in high school! Tell that to a woman who had to resort to prostitution because she couldn't complete her education!"

A sharp silence rang in the room. Keung hadn't lifted his gaze ever since Han Guang had started confessing her past. He was slightly trembling, and even if he wanted to speak, he felt at a loss.

"To me, everything looked in Zhiyuan's favor. The eldest son, the smartest son, the son of the daughter-in-law he chose and liked - he had everything that I lacked. Was I paranoid to think that Uncle Han would eventually hand over the Han Corps to him? No! If you stand where I stood all these years, then no! I wasn't paranoid."

She sneered. "You know? It's all flowery to say that they look at capabilities while choosing the CEO, but that is just lip service. That bloodline doesn't matter. If it doesn't then why did Uncle manage the company when Han Tian said he wanted to become a painter? He led the company until Zhiyuan was old enough to handle it. Why didn't he choose some capable employee of his company and give him the reins? Because in the end, it's his company that he made it! Why would he hand it over to a stranger rather than his own family members?

Which brings me to why I was so desperate about you. Because it was a walk in the park to make Zhiyuan the CEO, not you! In the end, you are not his biological grandson and that is the truth. But everything backfired and Zhiyuan became the CEO anyway. So I told you to embezzle money to have my revenge! Everything was for nothing! And you know one more thing?"

She angrily opened her cupboard and took a few envelopes. She rushed back and threw those envelopes on the bed.

"Open them, Keung."

He bit his lip and did so. His eyes widened seeing bundles of notes in them.

"This is some part of the embezzled money that I kept hidden. I never spent a cent of it on myself! I kept this money thinking if Uncle might throw us out someday. He hated me, after all. With this at least, we would have something to live on. Maybe it would be enough for you to start a small business.

From the beginning to the end, my interest was in only making my son prosper even if I had to stomp on others. Even if I had to play tricks because the harsh world which I came from, you would be devoured in an instant if you weren't scheming! You couldn't have survived at all!"