Chapter 7 – My Name
Chapter 7 – My Name
Benjamin stirred, his mind still cloaked in the fog of sleep. A gentle hand stroked his head, and he murmured something incoherent, too tired to fully awaken. As fingers brushed against his ears, they twitched in response, sending a light tickling sensation through him. It didn't feel unpleasant—just... strange.
Slowly, he blinked his eyes open, the morning light filtering softly into the room. As his vision cleared, he saw his mom sitting beside him, her hand resting gently on his head.
"Morning, sweetheart," she said softly, a warm smile lighting up her face.
He sat up slightly, still groggy. "Mom...?" he mumbled, the events of the previous night gradually returning to him. The realization of everything—his altered body, the fox ears, the tail—made his heart race for a moment. But his mom's calm presence helped ground him.
"How are you feeling?" she asked, still brushing his hair away from his face.
"I—I'm not really sure," Benjamin replied softly, uncertainty lacing his voice. And it was true. As memories of the previous day resurfaced, so did the swirling emotions and confusion that accompanied them. Everything still felt surreal, like a strange dream he hadn't fully woken from. His mind was too full, too scattered, and the weight of it all threatened to overwhelm him again.
Before the familiar wave of panic could rise, his mom leaned forward and gently kissed his forehead. The warmth of the gesture—simple yet full of love—pulled him back from the edge. She smiled down at him, her eyes filled with understanding.
"Let's go have some breakfast," she said softly, her voice soothing. "We'll take it one step at a time, okay? We'll figure it out, but first, let's get you something to eat."
As they made their way downstairs, the aroma of eggs and bacon filled the air, making his stomach rumble. The savory scent was almost intoxicating, and he couldn't help but feel his mouth water. But as they reached the bottom of the stairs, he felt something odd—a light draft, like something was moving behind him.
Curious, he glanced back, and his face flushed with heat when he realized what it was: his tail, swaying lightly in response to the smell of food. He hadn't even noticed it before, but now its movement felt embarrassingly obvious. He quickly tried to still it, but the sight only made his cheeks burn more.
He caught his mom's gaze; she was looking at it too. Her eyes sparkled with amusement as they met his. Embarrassment washed over him in an instant. She didn't say anything, but the small, knowing smile on her face made him want to sink into the floor.
Entering the kitchen, Benjamin's father greeted him, his tone gentle but tinged with the same cautious confusion from the night before. His dad's eyes lingered for a moment, trying to reconcile the girl standing before him with the son he once knew. It was clear he was grappling with the situation just as much as Benjamin was.
His father set plates of eggs and bacon on the table, and the three of them sat down to eat. A heavy silence filled the room, the only sound the soft clinking of silverware against plates. None of them seemed to know what to say or how to start a conversation. The weight of everything that had happened hung in the air like a fog.
Benjamin could feel his parents' glances, quick looks in his direction when they thought he wasn't paying attention. He tried to focus on his food, but their silent curiosity and worry pressed in on him. He knew they wanted to ask more questions—probably just as confused and worried as he was—but no one seemed to know how to begin.
Finally, his father broke the silence, clearing his throat before speaking. "So... this is really crazy, right?"
Benjamin nodded, his fork pausing over his plate. "Yeah," he replied, his voice quieter than he intended, unsure how else to respond. Understatement of the century, it was crazy—beyond crazy—and there wasn't much more to say about it.
His mom leaned in slightly, concern clear on her face. "I know I asked before," she said gently, "but how are you feeling? You're not in pain or any discomfort now, are you?"
He shook his head, pushing the food around on his plate with his fork. "No," he said. "I'm not in pain... just... I don't know. It's hard to explain." Physically, there was no ‘real’ discomfort, but the emotional and mental weight of it all sat heavy on him. He could still feel the strangeness of his body though—the way it moved, the ears, the tail, everything. It wasn't painful, but it wasn't something he could ignore either.
And then there was the part he couldn't push away, no matter how hard he tried—the fact that he wasn't just dealing with fox ears and a tail. He had been a guy for sixteen years, and now, suddenly, he was a girl. His body, his voice, even the way he moved—it was all different. It wasn't something he could adjust to overnight.
How can someone just accept that? The question kept bouncing around in his head, growing louder with each passing moment. His chest tightened as he realized how impossible it all felt. What am I supposed to do? He glanced down at himself, at the dress he had worn in the game now clinging to his smaller frame. Nothing felt like it belonged to him, yet here he was, expected to move forward.
The thought made him feel even more lost, like the ground beneath him had shifted. This wasn't something that looked like it could be easily undone, and the weight of that reality pressed harder against him.
Tears filled his eyes as the overwhelming thought struck. "What if I can't change back?" His voice wavered, thick with emotion. He could feel the tears threatening to spill over. A random thought shot through his mind. "I don't even have clothes that will fit me anymore..." he added, his words barely a whisper.
His parents exchanged a quick glance, his mother raising an eyebrow in surprise. "That's what you're worried about the most? Not having clothes that fit?" she asked, a soft smile playing on her lips despite the seriousness of the situation.
He blinked, wiping his eyes, realizing how small the worry seemed compared to everything else. But in that moment, it was something tangible, something he could focus on, unlike the bigger, scarier thoughts swirling in his head. He shrugged, still feeling the weight of it all. "It's just... I don't know... everything feels too big."
His mother gently placed her hand on his, her touch warm and reassuring. "It's okay," she said softly, her eyes full of kindness. "We'll support you, no matter what."
He nodded, the weight in his chest lightening just a little. "Thank you," he whispered, his voice thick with gratitude. He hadn't realized how much he needed to hear that, but it helped, even if things were still overwhelmingly confusing.
Just then, his father spoke up, his tone careful but curious. "If you can't change back anytime soon... what do you want us to call you?"
He wasn't ready for that question, and it hit him like a jolt. His mind raced. He had never thought about needing another name—he was Benjamin, wasn't he? But with the way he looked now, how everything had changed, it didn't feel quite right anymore. His voice caught in his throat, unsure how to respond.
He swallowed, feeling the question linger. What did he want to be called?
He was still Benjamin, right? But the memory of blurting out "Madelyn" to that villager in Astralyth Online tugged at him. But did he want to be called Madelyn? He didn't know; it didn't make sense. None of this did. The confusion felt like it was closing in again, twisting in his chest. His fox ears drooped, and he mumbled, "I don't know," barely loud enough to be heard.
His mom leaned in again, her hand resting gently on his shoulder. "It's okay, sweetheart," she said softly, her voice full of warmth and reassurance. "Take your time. Your dad and I will support your decisions, no matter what."
He nodded, grateful for the comfort, even though his mind was still spinning. The idea of a new name, a new identity, felt overwhelming.
Ever practical, his mom spoke up again. "We could look on the internet, see if anyone else has had these kinds of... changes happen to them. Maybe contact support, see what the company knows. They might have something in their system that can explain what happened."
Benjamin nodded, trying to focus on logical next steps. "Yeah, that makes sense," he said quietly, the idea of finding answers helping to settle some of the chaos in his mind.
"Okay," his mom continued, "while we do that, why don't you check with your friends? See if they've had any similar troubles."
His eyes widened in sudden realization. My friends! He had completely forgotten about them in all the confusion. They had planned to meet up in front of the Adventurer's Guild in Astralyth Online to check out their chosen characters and classes together. But he had no idea if they had experienced anything strange like he had.
"I totally forgot about them," he muttered, a mix of panic and guilt rushing through him.
He shot up from the table and rushed to his room, his mind now racing with thoughts of his friends. Grabbing his phone off the desk, he pressed his finger against the screen to unlock it. Nothing. An error message flashed on the screen. "Huh?" he muttered, trying again with no success.
It took him a moment, but then it finally dawned on him—his fingerprint didn't work anymore. His body had changed, his hands, his fingers, so of course the phone wouldn't recognize his old fingerprint. He let out a sigh, the small inconvenience just another reminder of how everything had changed. With a resigned look, he manually entered his password and unlocked the phone.
He opened the messaging app and scrolled through the messages, his heart sinking as he read. His friends had clearly been excited at first, but after meeting in the game and waiting for him, the mood had shifted.
Sarah: OMG, mine just arrived!!
Lillian: Same here! I can't wait!
James: Got mine too. We're all set, right? Meeting at the Adventurer's Guild?
David: Yeah, Adventurer's Guild as planned. See you all there soon.
Sarah: So excited! Logging in now!
Then, there was a pause. Everyone had logged into the game. The conversation picked up again hours later.
James: Hey, has anyone heard from Ben? I got nothing.
Lillian: No, and he didn't mention anything before we logged in. He wouldn't just bail on us without saying something, right?
David: We waited a long time. He's usually the first one there. It's not like him.
Sarah: Yeah, we were all together for hours... Where is he? This feels off.
Lillian: I'm starting to get worried. He would've told us if something was wrong.
James: Ben, if you're seeing this, where are you, man? We just logged out and still haven't heard from you.
Sarah: You okay? We need to know you're alright.
Lillian: Please let us know when you can. We're all worried.
Benjamin stared at the screen, guilt gnawing at him. They had waited for him, expecting him to log in, and had grown worried when he never showed. Now, he had to figure out how to explain the impossible.
With trembling hands, he typed out a response, his fingers shaky as they tapped the keys.
Benjamin: Sorry guys, I'm fine. Just ran into some trouble and need some time to figure it out.
He hesitated for a moment before pressing send, feeling the weight of his words. It wasn't a full explanation, but he couldn't begin to explain everything in a single message. For now, all he could do was let them know he was okay—at least, kind of. Inside, everything still felt like a mess.
His mom knocked gently on the door. "Hey, can you come down for a moment?" she asked, her voice carrying a note of hesitation. His stomach tightened at the sound, sensing something serious. He followed her downstairs, his mind still racing. When they reached the kitchen, his father was already sitting at the table, looking just as uncertain as his mother.
"So," his mom began, sitting down across from him, "I just called the support team for Astralyth Online." Her voice was careful, as though weighing every word. "I explained that my... child had run into some problems while playing the game, without going in to detail, and asked if they could check your account for us."
He watched as his mother hesitated again, her hands clasping nervously. "They told me they saw nothing wrong with your account."
He felt a flicker of confusion. Nothing wrong? That couldn't be right.
Then his mother took a deep breath and continued, her voice softer now. "The weird thing is, they said the account in question was registered under the name... Madelyn Fae Roth."
His heart skipped a beat. Madelyn? He had given that name in the game without thinking, but hearing it now, used by the company as though he had actually registered his account under that name, made it feel... real. His mind scrambled to make sense of it. How could a name he had blurted out in a virtual world be tied to his real identity? It was overwhelming, unsettling, like the ground beneath him had shifted again.
All he could do was sit there, staring at his mother, unsure how to respond, the weight of the moment pressing in on him. Madelyn Fae Roth. It echoed in his mind, a name he hadn’t chosen for himself but one that somehow, impossibly, felt like it might be his.