Akashic Records of the Bastard Child Engaged to a Goddess

Chapter 87 Fanatio is rather odd? And she likes to talk about sizes?

Holy Sword Tournament Arc

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(POV: Lumiere)

Seated right in front of me was Fanatio Pendragon, who was supposedly one of the top-notch sword maidens of the Shield Kingdom and participating in the oh-so-noble Holy Sword Festival.

Now, I'd heard of the Pendragon family name quite a few times, but since they had nada to do with the Cross Kingdom, I gave zero hoots about them.

Also, to ensure we didn't face any unforeseen issues, I had Umbra keep watch on Bluestella while Fulgur kept track of Arthur.

I wasn't sure whether to tell Arthur about what was going down, so I needed to play it smart for a bit longer.

Even though I had no tangible proof, getting the lowdown on Bluestella's sneaky schemes was absolutely crucial and I wasn't going to take any risks.

If only Nerbas didn't bite the stairs...

So, after wrapping up our registration, Fanatio and I decided to kick back and relax in a cozy little tavern before the preliminaries kicked off.

Fanatio finally spoke up after minutes of sitting in silence.

"Hey, are you going to keep wearing that mask?" she asked me, sounding mildly annoyed.

I nodded in response.

"Isn't it a bit uncomfortable?" she continued.

I shook my head.

"Well, do you want anything to drink?" she asked.

I nodded yet again.

Fanatio let out a frustrated sigh and folded her arms, causing her armor to clank.

"Are you going to keep answering every question with a nod?" she asked, clearly irritated.

I shook my head.

"Really?" her face contorted a bit.

"Sorry," I said indifferently.

Fanatio looked like a girl who hadn't experienced fun in her life even once, I could tell simply by looking at her.

A young woman with long, black hair and brown eyes. She had a slender, voluptuous figure one could call "resplendent." Her breasts were most likely G-Cups. She wore silver armor with the Pendragon family crest on the right breast, a black skirt, white boots, and golden earrings.

"You know what, you're lucky I'm a patient person," she said with a small smile. "Anyone else might have lashed out at you for nodding and shaking your head to every question."

"One person I can think of who'd definitely do that is Ophelia Fernberg," I replied.

Fanatio raised an eyebrow. "Ophelia?"

"She's a high elf I met in the Great Forest who tried to claim my dungeon for herself." (Lumiere)

Wait a minute, Ophelia was a swordsman, wouldn't it mean there was a likely chance that she was participating in this tournament? I made a mental note to find out later.

Fanatio snapped her fingers in front of my mask." Hello? You there?"

I raised my eyebrow from underneath my mask. "Why wouldn't I be?" I asked.

"Well, I couldn't tell from your mask," she said with a small smile.

"I guess you'll have to get used to it," I replied with a shrug.

It would've been fun to talk to her as Lumiere, but I had to keep up the guise of "Black."

Honestly, "Zero" was a better name.

"So, who do you think is the favorite to win the tournament?" I asked.

Fanatio didn't say anything for a moment, and I wondered if she had heard me. But then she turned her head and locked her blue eyes on mine.

"It's going to be me," she said confidently, folding her arms.

I raised an eyebrow. "Really? You're that confident?"

"Of course," she said. "I'm the best swordsman in the tournament."

I nodded. "Let's assume you're as good as you say. But what if there's someone out there who's better than you?"

Fanatio gave me a withering glance. "There isn't."

I held up my hands in surrender. "Okay, okay, I was just asking."

There was a moment of silence between us, and I felt a little awkward. I was trying to think of something else to say when a waiter suddenly appeared at our table.

"Good evening, wonderful couples," he said cheerfully. "Can I get you anything to drink? Or maybe try our special for couples?"

I opened my mouth to correct him, but before I could say anything, Fanatio spoke up.

"Oh, we're more than that," she said, giving the waiter a sly smile. "We're in love."

I felt my jaw drop in surprise. "What? No, we're not!" I broke character for a split-second.

But the waiter was already smiling and nodding. "Ah, I see! Well, then you two will definitely want to try our special. It's on the house for all couples today!"

He darted away to get our drinks, and I turned to glare at Fanatio. "What was that about?"

She just shrugged nonchalantly. "Couples eat free today. Might as well take advantage of it, right?"

I couldn't believe how brazen she was. "You can't just pretend we're dating, that's lying..."

Fanatio rolled her eyes. "Relax, it's just a little harmless fun. Besides, it's not like anyone believes us anyway."

"Honestly," I shook my head.

Fanatio smiled smugly. "You should be honored that I even considered you as a romantic interest."

Disappointed, I said, "Wow, I'm so glad."

"Oh don't give me that. If I said you could put your hot stuff inside me, wouldn't you?" she asked with a plain face.

Jeez, this girl was bold.

I was initially speechless. "That's another case entirely," I said, after a long pause.

"Or are you small down there?" she asked, indifferently.

"Let's n... just no." I ended the topic of sizes before it could even start.

The waiter came back with our drinks. As he set them down, he eyed us curiously.

"Here you go, lovebirds," he said.

The wait for the food was agonizingly long, and the food wasn't even that good.

...

Eventually, we made our way to the coliseum, the sound of clashing swords filled the air, catching our attention. We rushed over, eager to witness a thrilling fight, but what we saw was disappointing. Two men were clumsily swinging their swords at each other, more like a dance than a battle.

Fanatio wrinkled her nose in disgust and said, "The musky scent of men is sickening."

I couldn't help but tease her, "You must really hate men."

She nodded and added, "Their cocks are rather small too."

I stifled a laugh, knowing what she meant. What was with her cock sizes?

We both looked around, noticing the lack of spectators. It seemed everyone was more interested in the festivities of the Holy Sword Festival than these mediocre battles.

A group of men with beer mugs in hand cheered on the fighters, shouting words of encouragement. "You can do it!" and "Watch your side!"

I turned to Fanatio and said, "Hopefully I'll have an easy fight."

She replied, "From what I've seen, you're quite strong. It should be a breeze for you."

I nodded in agreement, but she clicked her tongue and scolded me, "Stop that nodding thing you do."

"Sorry," I said, my voice flat.

We both knew that the real action wouldn't start until the main elimination round of the tournament. Genny and Garret were also in the coliseum, but it was best not to make contact with them.

A few people in the small crowd were taking notes to be sure of who to bet on in the main round.

...

The coordinator for the preliminaries, a man with wild hair and a booming voice, suddenly shouted, "Black versus Jericho Alufilia Banst Cross!"

I groaned when I heard Jericho's name. Oh, great. My half-brother was in the tournament too. And of course, I had to fight him in the first round.

Coincidence? Sure.

Fanatio noticed my hesitation and spoke with her eyes closed and arms folded. "Don't hold back just because he's royalty. Show no mercy."

I nodded, feeling conflicted. "But still, it's unfortunate that I have to kick his ass in the first round."

Fanatio raised an eyebrow and replied, "Oh, is that how you really feel?"

I sighed and pouted, "Yeah, I guess so."

Soon after, I made my way out of the bleachers and towards the tunnel leading to the main field.