Chapter 286: Dozing - The End
Chapter 286: Dozing - The End
***Chapter 286 Dozing - The End***
“...Do you regret it? That you couldn’t say?”
Listening to the murmur of the stream and some old tales, Selene was at Elvena’s mercy.
Following her lead, Selene set aside her fishing rod, rested her head on Elvena’s thigh, and occasionally gently stroked her cheek. Over time, Selene had learned to let go of her tension.
It must have been about ten or twenty years since Bery disappeared.
"Strangely enough, not much... My sister always seemed happy."
To be honest, she was a bit scared.
Affectionate, caring, kind and gentle. She accepted Elvena as a member of the family, not as a servant, but she had an impression that she was too sincere.
She always kept her strings taut, never relaxing――even though she was a little younger than Elvena. As the Marshal of the Kingdom and the head of the noble Christand house, she always demonstrated a demeanor befitting her heavy responsibilities, so that no one could complain about her.
Elvena couldn't understand all of her feelings, but she could at least guess.
The two princesses and not to mention the servants, seemed perfect, at least in terms of ability. In front of these women, who could effortlessly make the impossible happen with a calm face, effort was only a given.
For ordinary people, giving their all only amounted to their bare minimum.
The lights in Selene rooms never went out until late at night, yet she always managed to show composure in front of them, smiling as the master of the mansion.
Krische looked troubled.
Bery looked worried.
Kreschenta looked as if she had no expectations.
In any case, all three of them were always concerned about her, telling her that she should just relax a little more――kindness can sometimes be cruel, Elvena thought.
For her, who was struggling desperately to stand next to them, those words must have been unacceptable.
They seemed so tense that Elvena felt that the tension between them would one day snap, and in fact it did once happen.
Perhaps that's why.
“I see… But I think humans can be like that. No matter how much you worry, sometimes just seeing someone’s happy smile can make it all seem trivial... and you feel fulfilled."
“…Maybe so.”
Now relaxed, she appeared utterly serene.
Had this conversation occurred in the past, she would have understood what Elvena was feeling more than herself did.
Because she was always a sincere person who tried to be close to others, a person who was kind-hearted and sensitive to emotions.
Both Elvena and Berry were probably bad at handling their emotions, and somewhere deep inside they were awake.
Logic comes before emotions, and only when logic was present could they express what was in their heart.
People like Selene and Anne were the complete opposite, emotions took precedence over logic――perhaps that was why they were so lovely.
Bery seemed to envy and admire them from the bottom of her heart, and Elvena shares those feelings too.
Having someone express emotions unrelated to logic felt awkward, sometimes heavy or even bothersome. That’s why she confided in Bery that day, feeling Bery understood, providing a comforting space for her heart rather than sympathy.
"There's no point in hurting yourself. Even if it's just a convenient excuse or sophistry, if you can accept it then you’re strong... Though being all about sophistry like Bery isn’t ideal either.”
“...Fufu”
But right now, she was the same, giving Elvena as much just as she wanted.
If Bery was to capture the delicate wax and waning of emotions and slip into those gaps, hers was like accepting everything as it was, embracing it.
That soft emotion feels good, so she closes her eyes.
Surely, what lies beneath it must be a similar emotion.
But it feels strange, like they're completely different.
Like a soft bed or a sunlit meadow, both had their own comforts and were not the same――same with love.
Love, too, is shaped by one’s way of living and experiences.
“Love is like a box.”
"...?"
“...When you name it, the inside of the box called love is rich and diverse. Peeking into someone’s box reveals different treasures. Whether clear and defined like Krische and Mia or complex like Selene and Bery… Being here and observing them is simply enjoyable… That’s probably why I don’t feel regret.”
Boxes with different appearances, contents, and sometimes even names.
The appearance, contents, and even names of the boxes varied from person to person.
“Like looking at jewels. ...My love for my sister remains beautiful, now and forever.”
――’I want to continue to cherish it’, Elvena said with a smile.
Selene stared at her, deep in thought, and Elvena stroked her forehead.
"In a way, maybe it's because I couldn't get it that it's beautiful... Even now, I'm still dozing, still unclear, but there is something in my heart that I think is beautiful... Everything I see appears beautiful."
Her sister had searched desperately for her, which allowed Elvena to grasp this moment.
Her everyday life was like a jewel box, but even its outline was unclear.
The everyday life Elvena lives now is made up entirely of her sister's love, and of her love for her sister.
Nothing could be more beautiful, and it would never fade, she thought.
"...I'm sure that's because I didn't make it clear."
This world continues forever, a drowsy morning where dusk never comes.
It was a place created for that, a place allowed to be so.
“…You and Bery say difficult things.”
“I knew Selene-sama would say that, so I did it on purpose.”
"...Are you being mischievous?"
"Maybe."
She giggled, and Selene pinched her cheek with a displeased look on her face.
Even though Selene pinched her, what was conveyed was affection, not pain.
Selene said in an exasperated tone.
"But, even I can understand a little bit. How old do you think I am?"
"...I thought Selene-sama would say that."
"...You"
Selene stretched Elvena’s cheek, and then after a while she let go.
Selene furrowed her brow, and Elvena smoothed it with her fingers, shaking her shoulders.
“Maybe I’m just being stubborn because I couldn’t have it… But if that stubbornness brings happiness, then maybe it’s not so bad… Fufu, I agree with the sophistry part. We’re similar in that way.”
"...So you're saying I'm the same?"
"I guess the difference is whether the actual thing is by your side or not."
"..."
"When I look at Selene-sama, it's like there are two different versions of me, and it's a bit fun."
The one they loved most had someone they loved most.
But that didn’t mean it's unhappiness, and seeing someone you love loving someone and smiling happily, and smiling at them, was not all that painful.
And if they direct that same love towards you, it's even more so.
“I haven’t admitted defeat to Bery alright.”
"If you say that, then maybe me too. ...I'm not admitting defeat to Mia-san."
Elvena smiled at Selene’s disgruntled glare.
Some things never change, no matter how many years pass.
"...I think that Nee-san would have accepted me somehow. I feel bad for Mia-san, but I don't think she would say no too. Even though she might complain to Nee-san while getting jealous, we would probably have a fun daily life."
Selene was Elvena’s ‘what if’.
The more you believe that love is pure, the more it seems like there is no room for another, but in reality, love is not so cramped.
At least, that was the love of the people around Elvena.
Spacious, relaxed, soft――limitless, shining even when filled with various things, and not cramped.
"But love is different for each person, and has its own beauty... I think I just liked looking at it and touching it from time to time."
The way of love was surely different for each person.
Wanting to feel satisfied was one form, while wanting to taste, observe, and savor was another, neither wrong.
Some want a single gem for themselves, others want to admire various gems. Elvena was simply the latter.
And this was the museum of such gems to which Elvena had been invited.
Not all of them belonged to Elvena, and that was why everything belonged to her.
"No matter what form it takes, I don't think there is any superiority or inferiority in beautiful things...the only difference is whether you like it or not, and in the end, the one who enjoys it wins."
Some were transparent, while others had complex colors.
Hers was akin to what she once desired――but even though she could not have it, it shone beautifully before her eyes, in her hands.
The colors changed as she changed her perspective, and she never got tired of it.
And as Elvena looked at them, she seemed to melt into that shining happiness.
"Nee-san loves me... and the happiness of this place that Nee-san gave me is also something that Nee-san gave to me. The nuances aside, that's how it is, so spending my days with Selene and the others is enjoyable and happy… That’s probably proof of my love for her.”
Selene pondered deeply again, sighed, and said,
“You’re just as strange as Berry. I finally got that much.”
"Fufu, if you say that, I think you're quite strange as well, Selene-sama..."
Looking at Selene's displeased face again, Elvena laughed.
In fact, they were all strange people.
Without a purpose, without an end.
It was impossible for normal people to think that they would enjoy a trivial, peaceful daily life without ups and downs forever from the bottom of their hearts.
And that's why Elvena felt comfortable and wanted to purely enjoy it.
Suddenly, her expression turned sad.
“…But sometimes, I still feel lonely.”
“Lonely…?”
“Yes. Despite everything, seeing how close you all are, I sometimes long for human warmth.”
“I-I see…”
Selene averted her gaze, and Elvena stroked her cheek, brushing her lips.
"Will you forgive me if I act selfish sometimes...?"
"By selfish, you mean..."
"...Should I explain?"
“N-no… it’s okay…”
What was she imagining?
Watching Selene's face begin to flush again, Elvena smiled inwardly.
“No, such methods are unfair… Please forget it.”
"Um, well, it's not unfair or anything... well... I mean, I need some time to think about it――"
"It's okay. I don't mean to cause Selene-sama any trouble."
Pressing her thumb over her lips, Elvena continued, ‘Let's change the topic’.
"As I said, it's like I'm looking at another version of myself... I can't think of Selene-sama as a stranger."
With her mouth covered, Selene nodded silently for the time being.
"Bery, the one Selene-sama chose as your opponent, is a formidable woman. It would certainly be difficult for Selene-sama to defeat hrt, even with ordinary effort. I felt the same way, even though I didn't lose to Mia."
Looking at Selene's face as if she wanted to ask what she was saying out of nowhere, Elvena continued.
"...Therefore, I humbly ask if I could also assist you, Selene-sama."
“...Assist?”
She repeated what she said as Elvena let her lips go.
Selene had been swayed by Elvena's ‘selfishness’ and had been forced to reject it.
After refusing something, she asked for a more modest request――inevitably, an atmosphere that made it difficult to refuse was created.
"Yes. Bery-sama certainly does seem flawless at first glance――at least, it's difficult to gain an advantage as long as Bery-sana held the reins, but she does have weaknesses."
"A weakness?"
"Yes. Lady Berry is exceedingly shy and lacks confidence in herself. Pressing on that point can weaken her. For you to defeat Bery-sama, it's crucial to exploit this weakness and build a psychological advantage."
"I... I see..."
Perhaps also wanting to steer away from the previous topic, Selene nodded sincerely.
Observing this, Elvena's eyes narrowed slightly.
"To gain the initiative, you can't just go through the motions of daily life; you need to review everything meticulously. If you allow me, I'd like to help you in a subtle way that aligns with your wishes."
"Uh... that sounds helpful, but isn't it a bit underhanded――"
"No, Bery-sama almost always has Krische-sama by her side, and often uses Krische -sama to dodge Selene-sama's pursuits――effectively two against one. This is a fair fight, and I won't interfere any more than that."
‘It's okay,’ Elvena continues.
"I'm not trying to help Selene-sama in any way, I'm just cooperating to create a situation where Selene-sama can be on an equal footing with Berry-sama. ... Just a little, 'small' help. For example, after dinner tonight――"
To fully enjoy the present moment, Elvena smiled.
‘...Really, Usa-chan sure is Usa-chan when she speaks. Eternal paradise.’
‘Fufe, but... I feel a little relieved. Whether it's right or wrong, I was full of anxiety about what would happen to the mansion after Bery-sama was gone.’
‘Well, that's true. ...So, Elvena, have you decided?’
Her sister already knew it vaguely.
She wasn't sure if it was after they became lovers, or if she had noticed it before and it had become stronger as a result, but somehow.
‘Do you want to hear it?’
‘Hmm... I won't pry. If Elvena doesn't want to answer, it means she doesn't really want to say.’
But, her sister continued.
‘I'll just tell you that there's no need to be considerate of me or Mia. ...If you want to talk, then talk. If you want to ask for advice, then ask for advice. Even if you are being selfish and causing trouble, Mia and I will love and accept you.’
What did her sister mean by being selfish?
She couldn't confirm the answer, but at the very least, if it had been Elvena who told her feelings, instead of Mia, she didn't think her sister would have been that surprised.
Elvena felt that her sister would love Elvena, even including that.
'If you can say that you have no regrets after thinking about it, then I won't say anything. ...That's Elvena's life.’
Of course, it was just a vague feeling.
There was no basis for it, but it was enough to make Elvena feel strange.
'...Yes, Nee-san.'
Her sister probably wouldn't choose the same path as the princess.
Elvena made her decision at the time, knowing that.
It's not like she purposefully chose a different path.
She would have been happy if they had wanted to come together.
But that wasn't the reason. She simply decided because she thought that the emotions she felt at that time would become something she could hold onto forever.
And even after a thousand years had passed, she had no regrets.
They spent their days repeating the same mundane daily routine, never getting bored.
Eating, bathing, sleeping together, they spent their days doing trivial things with all their might, and no one questioned it.
They didn't have to worry about such important matters as the survival of the kingdom, or the life and death of people, and instead this world was a bed of roses, where they were troubled every day by trivial and foolish matters.
A literal representation of a child's dream world.
And many foolish adults who revered this utopia played house every day in earnest.
It was neither normal nor healthy, and if she told a passing person that they had been living like this in such a place for a thousand years, they would surely doubt Elvena's sanity.
They might even frown and call them crazy.
But even with that reaction, at least Elvena could proudly say that this was the happiest place in the world, and she was sure the others would agree.
It wasn't normal, and she couldn't deny that it was crazy, but whatever the case, it was certain that her senses were becoming distorted.
Elvena and the others often didn't count how many years it was.
It wasn't because they were tired of spending eternity, but rather because, although they had dutifully counted each year for the first hundred years or so, the feeling of a year had begun to feel meaningless.
A year as a child seemed like an enormous amount of time, but now it goes by in the blink of an eye.
They usually counted time in units of four or five years.
Probably because that's how often they held banquets in front of the dragons.
A year for a five-year-old takes up one-fifth of their life, but after a thousand years it's one-thousandth.
It's been a long time since they have occasionally said things like, ‘Come to think of it, about two or three hundred years ago...’, they harvest crops as if they were watering them, and birthday celebrations were just an excuse for a little party.
Just like in the past, they only think about yesterday, today, and tomorrow, and one day someone will surely say, ‘Come to think of it, about two or three thousand years ago...’.
Counting Elvena's vague history, it must be about 1,300 years since they came here.
Selene and Crescenta, Elvena and Anne, and Krische and Bery.
As usual, they all went shopping.
There were various things to buy that day, so they paired up by drawing lots as usual (because there was one girl who was throwing a tantrum and wanted to be paired with her sister) and then parted ways. Elvena also stopped by a bookstore at Anne's request, and bought some sewing tools to try making clothes and underwear, and then went for a walk.
Most things could be found at that place, but there were also a fair number of things that weren’t made there, such as cleaning supplies, tableware, clothes, and paper.
Of course, if they wanted to, Cliche and the others could easily replicate them (literally create the same thing using magical powers), but they have a policy of not cheating in that way.
Because of this, they regularly shop in various places around the world, and make money by selling crops, wine, and things that Selene has made――but it had been over a decade since they last visited Albeneria, as Krische and Bery have become obsessed with cooking using local specialties from various region.
With its many shops and large market, Albeneria was still their most visited city――but even so, that's how it is.
For Elvena and the others, whose sense of time was different now, it seemed like a miraculous coincidence.
After shopping, they returned to the meeting place, but Krische and Bery did not show up when the time came.
And they were not where they had been heading, and while calming for Kreschenta, who was getting increasingly upset, they searched around until dusk, when the two women came out of the museum.
Krische took Bery's hand and ran over to them, smiling happily as she told Elvena that they were Kalua and Mia.
"... Nee-san and Mia-san?"
"Yes, their reincarnation. Want to talk with them?"
One was a race called beastmen born in the late Kleinmeer period.
Black hair and cat-like ears and a swinging tail――a woman wearing an apron dress.
The other was a girl with golden hair and a robe.
She didn't hear their voices or see their movements, but she knew immediately which was which just from the way they stood, without even having to ask.
Was it the vaguely nostalgic atmosphere that made her feel that way?
Or was it because she sensed something that could be called a soul inside them?
Bery, who was next to Krische, also asked with her eyes, and Anne, who was listening, looked surprised.
Kreschenta calmed down and looked at the two of them in the distance with interest, while Selene seemed somewhat worried about Elvena.
Looking at them, Elvena shook her head with a wry smile.
"No. Neither of them know me...so don't worry about it."
"You sure? Krische thinks it's probably an amazing fortuitous encounter..."
"Yes. ...I guess I’m satisfied just seeing them from afar"
What were the chances of meeting these two people by chance out of all the people living in this wide world?
"Fufu, was it the effect of a spell you cast some time ago?"
Was this their first reincarnation, or had they been reincarnated several times?
Whatever the case may be, it's a trivial matter.
It's probably such a small probability that it's not even worth thinking about.
"Probably. Ehehe, they get along well and their atmosphere was also the same."
"That's good to hear."
——That’s why this encounter felt a little destined, Elvena thought and smiled.
The two were still living here in this world, just like back then, as ordinary humans.
She wondered what kind of expressions they would make if they knew that Elvena and the others were still living their silly, happy lives.
She could imagine their exasperated expressions and smiled wryly.
Even after being reborn, the two of them were still having fun.
And Elvena, too, has not changed and is still living happily.
That's enough for me, and that's the way each of them chose to be, nothing more.
Of course she was happy for the two of them, but she didn’t feel like exchanging a word with them.
Just thinking about what will happen next is more than enough to satisfy her――she just bowed her head and wished them happiness.
Seeing the girls bow back with a confused look on their faces, she smiled wryly once again.
"Thank you very much. ...Let’s go, Krische-sama”
"Yes."
Krische bowed her head as well, and so did Bery.
They turned their backs and started walking.
"...Are you happy?"
"Yes. ...The Nee-san I chose is the big sister who chose Mia."
She smiled back at Selene, who seemed concerned.
Reincarnation――Even if they had no memories of it, they were still her sister and Mia.
But the two people Elvena loved were still in her heart.
"Besides, I'm the only one who still remembers the Nee-san that Mia doesn't know...and I've always loved her. Basically, I won...but if I talked to them and felt even a little jealous, it would ruin my mood, so this is fine."
At the corner――There, the city and the trees blended together in a dim light.
Going through it, they entered a mansion in the forest, with a fantasy as far as the eye could see.
A dreamlike state called eternity, in the gap between something and something else.
"...This is the place I chose to be."
This is the world Elvena lives in, the everyday life she spends.
Filled with modest happiness, in an eternal slumber.
Unclear, uncertain, ambiguous, without a clear outline,
"You're stubborn, aren't you?"
But she gave this dozing daily life a name, Proof of Love.
...Yes, I'm stubborn.
It has not changed in a thousand years, and it will never change in the future.
Drawing a line and such, is fine.